Queen Latifah “All of Me”

New Line has signed Queen Latifah to either play Steve Martin‘s or Lily Tomlin‘s role in a remake of All of Me. I’m presuming that my first reaction upon reading this in yesterday’s Variety — a mixture of revulsion and horror — is being echoed all across America and on all the ships at sea.

Let’s presume that Queen Latifah, being a woman of considerable fame and a sizable ego, is looking to play the Martin role. (It’s unusual to announce a big star being in a new project if he/she is set to play the second lead.) Martin’s performance was probably the best thing he’s ever done, due in large measure to his gifts as a spazzy physical comedian. Does Queen Latifah possess even a fraction of the comic talent that Martin has — or used to have, at least — in his little pinkie finger?

People of taste should, of course, avoid this film at all costs if she takes the Martin role, but if she’s playing Tomlin’s…well, let’ see.

  • jeffmcm

    I don’t think there’s any possibility of her playing Martin’s role. I can totally see her wagging her finger at someone from inside a mirror, though.

  • Mike Schaefer

    Indeed, the potential lies in some spazzy, incredibly white guy being “possessed” by Latifah, not the other way around.

    I still say somebody needs to sign her up for “The Pearl Bailey Story” before she gets too old.

  • George Prager

    I’m waiting for the remake of Citizen Kane starring Bernie Mac.

  • Balthazar

    Or Casablanca with Ashton Kutcher and Heather Graham.

    Or Gunga Din with Luis Guzman and Rowdy Roddy Piper

    Or Boogie Nights with Shia LaBeouf

  • jeffmcm

    Gunga Din with Guzman and Rowdy Roddy actually sounds pretty good.

  • The Hey

    Jimmy Fallon!!! 🙂

  • http://www.pen15club.net Rob

    Is this “Hate on Successful Actresses Week” at Hollywood Elsewhere? Between the Latifah, Angelina, Nicole and Julia Stiles rants, is any actress allowed to star in a leading role in any film, or should it just be Jessica Biel-style damsels in distress from now on?

  • http://cjkennedy.wordpress.com/ Craig Kennedy

    Pretty soon Hollywood is going to have to start remaking remakes. Of course, actually coming up with an original idea is out of the question.

  • http://journals.aol.com/terrymcca/poetry-arts-confidential/ Terry McCarty

    Already guessing Adam Shankman will direct the remake.

  • Wrecktum

    It’s not like “All of Me” some kind of masterpiece. Who cares?

  • D.Z.

    Jeff: How is Latifah a “big star”? She’s only had one hit. Anyway, she actually used to be respectable, before she started doing lowbrow comedies.

    It’s also telling from the comments that derision of black actors playing white roles seems to be associated with the lack of quality of a remake, rather than the script. Of course, when white people play Asian or Latin roles in Hollywood remakes, it’s suddenly ok.

  • D.Z.

    Sorry, I’ll rephrase that to “derisive comments”.

  • christian

    fucking awesome news!

  • lesterg

    I’m going to suggest that a post-Hulk sequel whoring Edward Norton would be perfect for the Martin role.

    He’ll be priceless in the scene where Latifah tries to teach him not to dance like a white man.

  • http://martiansattackingindianapolis.blogspot.com/ Josh Massey

    Yeah, there’s no way she’s playing the Martin role. C’mon, this is just another entry in the “look how nerdy white guys are” genre (which Latifah has already tackled with Martin in Bringing Down the House).

  • lesterg

    Jeff: How is Latifah a “big star”? She’s only had one hit.”

    Chicago made 170 million, Bringing Down the House made 132 million.

    Her solo films aren’t box-office gold, but they all end up in the high 30’s to low 40’s. She’s pretty consistent.

  • anti-sardine

    I can’t wait to not see this.

  • jeffmcm

    I can’t think of any movies where white people were playing Asian or Latino where it was considered ‘okay’. Rob Schneider playing an Asian in Chuck and Larry looks retarded. Ditto Angelina Jolie playing black in whatever the name of that movie is.

    Wrong again, DZ.

  • D.Z.

    jeff: “I can’t think of any movies where white people were playing Asian or Latino where it was considered ‘okay’.”

    Reservoir Dogs and Scarface comes to mind.

  • jeffmcm

    There are no Asian characters in Reservoir Dogs.

    And Pacino’s Italian playing a Cuban, so big deal.

  • Arran

    Yeah, remember all those Asian characters in Dogs?

    I know you’re referring to the fact that it’s a rip-off of City on Fire, but that doesn’t make you any less of a fucking moron.

  • jcal

    I’m waiting for the remake of Citizen Kane starring Bernie Mac.

  • Ardee-El

    Geez, Jeff, do a little research first. Your rant will take on greater depth. This isn’t a woman’s spirit in a man’s body, it’s a conservative in a liberal’s body. Think Ann Coulter’s soul (if she has one) temporarily taking up residence in Rosie O√ɬ¢√¢‚Äö¬¨√¢‚Äû¬¢Donnell. (They√ɬ¢√¢‚Äö¬¨√¢‚Äû¬¢ve already announced the actress playing Lily Tomlin√ɬ¢√¢‚Äö¬¨√¢‚Äû¬¢s role, it made such an impact on me that I’ve already forgotten who it was.)

    There’s a special corner of hell for actors trying to replace an actor in a role they’ve already made their own. She’ll be close by Steve Martin (who earned his spot for “Sgt. Bilko” and then “The Pink Panther”) for trying to fill Alec Guinness’ shoes in “Last Holiday” (where-o-where is the original of this on DVD, by the way?); what more can she get for trying on Steve Martin√ɬ¢√¢‚Äö¬¨√¢‚Äû¬¢s broken arrow? An extra wheelbarrow of hot coals?

    Wow! I’m pretty cynical for a Friday.

  • http://hollywoodgraffiti.blogspot.com atticusrex

    Rob: The complaints here about Queen L is not that she is starring… it’s that she is making a movie that doesn’t need to be made unless it can be tweaked as a sequel like this summer’s Evan Almighty.

    Wrecktum: Your right ‘All of Me’ is not a “Classic” yet it works and is one of Martin’s best physical comedic role. Tomlin as well does good work. Nobody other than Jim Carrey does ‘spaz’ movements like Steve.

    I just wish Hollywood if they want to keep going back to the well for ideas… that they would remake movies that either didn’t work out the first time out but had a good story or perhaps a decent movie that could really benifit from the SFX we have today.

    But to remake a movie that is either a proven treasured classic or at the very least worked really well on it’s own and still holds up… well that’s just plain laziness! If this keeps up when Robert Downey Jr. is in his late 60’s or so he will star in the remake of ‘The Godfather’ geesh!

  • http://cjkennedy.wordpress.com/ cjKennedy

    Pretty soon Hollywood is going to have to start remaking remakes. Of course, actually coming up with an original idea is out of the question.

  • bmcintire

    I’m seeing Eugene Levy as the Steve Martin character, just to close the circle of hell on the BRINGING DOWN THE HOUSE cast. Lily Tomlin can sit off-camera to the director’s side and let him know what a fuckstick he is.

  • bmcintire

    jeffmcm – Angelina Jolie is playing executed journalist Daniel Pearle’s wife Marianne in A MIGHTY HEART. Mrs. Pearle, who is of mixed African-Dutch-Chinese descent (and a resident of the UK) is thrilled with the fact that she is being played be Jolie. Of course, the fact that she’s being played by one of the hottest women in film probably had as much to do with that happiness as her ethnicity.

  • christian

    no, really, this is incredible hollywood news!

    whoda thunk to not remake this with queen latifah?

    i’m so there!

  • JohnnyCanuck

    Back in Bowl…Back in Bowl

    They should take this idea and put it back in the bowl and flush again.