comment #1

p.Vice says ...

I want to see him die Braveheart style... except I bet his torturers would discover that he had already been castrated.

comment #2

Alan Cerny says ...

Well, I think the movie's PG-13 (whatever that means today) and I highly doubt you'll see any bullets actually enter the body and rip him to shreds. Are we talking Peckinpahesque squib explosions, here?

comment #3

Alan Cerny says ...

It would be nice, actually, to see Cruise buy it like that hapless executive against the ED-209 in ROBOCOP.

comment #4

Howlingman says ...

Damn it Jeff, that's a pretty big spoiler for those of us who've been under a rock our entire lives!

Jerk.

comment #5

snoop says ...

So I'm not throwing a spoiler up on who gets it, but that's why you've got to love the deaths in Burn After Reading.

comment #6

EnglishBob says ...

Is it me or is watching most trailers these days just like staring into a rapidly increasing strobe-light?

comment #7

jc says ...

Not to kowtow to the establishment, but I'm kind of glad that I didn't see Butch and Sundance get slaughtered.

comment #8

EnglishBob says ...

Oh, and DiCaprio certainly didn't "die quietly" at the end of The Departed. (I trust that's no longer a spoiler!)

comment #9

chicbn872 says ...

The first killing in "Burn After Reading" was acceptable, twisted, and brave. The second one? Awful. That second character's death was pointless and disgusting considering the character was the only good and decent person in the movie.

comment #10

Monument says ...

Jeff can you start banning people who complain about spoilers in movies based on historical events? Maybe some kind of ignorance penalty? It must be a mighty big rock some of you boys are living under.

comment #11

Rich S. says ...

Don't forget Breaker Morant: "Shoot straight, you bastards! Don't make a mess of it!"

comment #12

Howlingman says ...

Hopefully not before banning people who don't get when a joke's a joke.

comment #13

Monument says ...

Tell better jokes then, it's often hard to tell between idiocy and sarcasm around here. But I'm glad to know you're not an ignoramus.

comment #14

rr3333 says ...

Why no accents like Siegfried from 'Get Shmart'?

comment #15

ScottMendelson says ...

Not to be annoying, chicbn872, but your Burn After Reading comments do constitute a massive spoiler.

SPOILERS...
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I know you're being vague. But had I not seen the movie already, and then gone to see it, I would have figured out which character you were referring to within the first fifteen-minutes. Since it's painfully obvious which character is the only one of the group that isn't selfish and conniving. Sometimes, in context, even vague references such as that constitute major spoilers. Again, not to be a prick, but you might have given away more than you intended.

comment #16

Mark says ...

I know there was a thread about this topic before, but i thought it worth repeating that Kurt Russell's death in Posiedon is top-tier torture. Good stuff.

btw, that trailer is infinitely better than the previous one.

comment #17

Joshua Mooney says ...

Right fucking on, Rich S. That final scene in "Breaker Morant" is truly stunning and powerful, and has stayed with me since I first saw it almost a quarter-century ago. The whole film is right up there with "Paths of Glory" and "Apocalypse Now," in my book.

comment #18

BurmaShave says ...

chicbn872 you sound like someone making fun of people who complain about Coen Brothers movies.

comment #19

bildeaux says ...

Thanks a bunch chicbn872. As Scott Mendelson noted, now everyone will know that the janitor who finds the CIA data in the gym gets it in the end. You should be ashamed!

b.

comment #20

thorsen1nk says ...

1) This trailer is VASTLY superior than the other ones--really plays up the suspense element, even if it's a foregone conclusion.

2) I totally agree that it should show the executions. They could do it from a medium-long shot and show him just drop and still make it effective and keep the PG-13. I think the importance is the finality and the suddenness of seeing a heroic figure just blown away a la Breaker Morant

3) DiCaprio shying away from a brutal end, Jeff? I have two words for you: The Departed

comment #21

thorsen1nk says ...

oh and to all the burn after reading spoiler posters: Fuck you.

comment #22

Majorian99 says ...

Right on Mr. Mooney! Couldn't agree more on your views on BREAKER MORANT, PATHS OF GLORY and APOCALYPSE NOW -- although i would subtly add THE THIN RED LINE to that privileged few titles...

comment #23

lazarus says ...

Jeff, I wouldn't call Brando's death in Last Tango "dignified", unless you consider sticking a piece of chewing gum on the railing of a balcony before you curl up and expire some kind of classy exit. I thought it was meant to be very unglorious, and rather pathetic.

comment #24

Krazy Eyes says ...

It's bad enough that the "second death" in Burn After Reading was completely spoiled in the trailer -- unless you believe that Malkovich has horrible aim with a hatchet.

comment #25

Deathtongue_Groupie says ...

Really, you knew that? Why, because when the movie was announced you went to Wikipedia to look it up. Because outside of the right-wingers on here (who always know a disturbing way too much minutia about the Third Reich), I doubt very seriously you knew the fate's of every single person who has since been identified with the plot.

Because, to use one of your challenges, I bet if I put a gun to your head and told you I would fire when you screwed up the plotter's outcome, eventually your brains would be on the wall.

comment #26

Hi Hitler says ...

Fear not.

Having seen the film, I can tell you firsthand that the filmmakers pull no punches at the end.

This film is gonna surprise a lot of people...almost as much as the fact that it garnered a PG-13 surprised me.

comment #27

snoop says ...

chicbn872 says ...
The first killing in "Burn After Reading" was acceptable, twisted, and brave. The second one? Awful. That second character's death was pointless and disgusting considering the character was the only good and decent person in the movie.

I would actually venture to say that the first character was relatively good and decent as well. Consider everything that person did was unselfish. Now I'm entering spoiler territory as well though, so... apologies.

comment #28

Amazing Larry says ...

First of all, if you haven't seen BURN AFTER READING yet, what are you waiting for? Get thee to the movie, sir.

Second of all, is it really spoilers that characters will die in a frakkin' Coen Brothers movie? That's like complaining about the bad language in a Tarantino film: it's their TRADEMARK. Sudden, violent deaths happen in EVERY Coen Brothers flick.

Third of all, if being spoiled on a movie is the worst thing to happen to you, then you've got a goddamn wonderful life, slappy. People are losing their jobs, families are losing their homes, and kids are starving... but please excuse me while I weep some tears because you were spoiled. Two words: Big and Deal.

Jeesus, I am sick to death of Tom Cruise. Any movie that has him in it doesn't get a penny from me, ever. I'm either avoiding it entirely (in the case of VALKRIE) or sneaking in or Netflix'ing it later (if he should happen to work with somebody interesting like C. Crowe or PTA). I'm tired of him stinking up the movies and I just want him to go the hell away.

comment #29

George Prager says ...

I want to die like Don Stroud in BLOODY MAMA.

comment #30

Spacesheik says ...

Since this is a Bryan Singer film, expect 1:30 hours of angst, 30 seconds of action and an anticlimax set in a hospital.

But who knows? Since its a Tom Cruise flick he might survive the execution while his peers die and get to pontificate the German chancellor on the evils of Nazism a la LAST SAMURAI.

Seriously though I am only going to see this film because of the stellar British supporting cast (Branagh, Stamp etc).

comment #31

hcat says ...

The movie will end with Cruise wearing a fake mustache and nursing his wounds in South America.

comment #32

huisache says ...

I wanted to see that murderous scumbag Che Guevara get his in the end and with less dignity than all the people he murdered in the soccer stadium. I gather he is portrayed as a selfless patriot who was only trying to do what was best for the people but ultimately fell a little short of his goals.

Like Hitler.

comment #33

madskrilla says ...

Mr. Wells, I respectfully disagree. You can show a huge star like Cruise (or Pitt, or Jolie, or Clooney, etc) die on screen and it just isn't that much affecting -- we all know they're alive and well, we saw them on the gossip blogs right before we left for the movie theater.

A great master like Malick knows this. That's why he cast actors who were then unknown as the cannon fodder in THE THIN RED LINE, and big stars in minor roles (and they stay alive)

THE DIVING BELL AND THE BUTTERFLY really broke your heart because nobody knew that French actor. Johnny Depp, who was initially supposed to get the role, would have been splendid in it -- but his Calvary and death would not have been as affecting

comment #34

Joshua Mooney says ...

Hey, Majorian99, of course "Thin Red Line" is a worthy addition to my list, but I wasn't trying to be cmoprehensive, in any case. In some ways, "TRL," which I was just watching again this evening, is the best of the bunch. It's flawed-- hell they're all flawed, hell, any great work of art is somehow flawed. Buit we're lucky to have them.

comment #35

lionsfan says ...

This is kind of a grisly thread. "Valkyrie" might prove even grislier if, as really happened, it shows several of the July 20 conspirators hanged by the SS and left to writhe upon meathooks. (I kind of think that'd be an appropriate fate for, say, Kenneth Branagh. Or for Xenu!) These executions, perhaps comprising the first genuine "snuff movie," were supposedly filmed and shown to Hitler for his enjoyment. They have never surfaced since, but rumors abounded for a long tiime as to who had them and what they paid for them.

Von Stauffenberg was, however, shot to death with a few others. The yearly commemoration of their death at what was then the hq for (I believe) German military intelligence draws something like 5-6 ever-more-elderly mourners tops. And no press or citizens of "young," post-WWII Germany, the Germany which lived through the Baader-Meinhof gang and adulation of Che and is today arguably the most pacifist-leaning country in Europe. Some coverage, anyway recreation, of this annual event might thus be the proper, best way to end "Valkyrie."

The motives of the July 20 plotters against Hitler were many and complex. Some were dreamy Catholics, some unremorseful militarists who wished to unite with the Allies to fight what they perceived as the "real" enemy in Russia, still others were Christian socialists, idealists, etc. Hardly any of them, however, seemingly had anything more than a vague idea of the enormity of the task which awaited them if they'd been successful in killing Hitler, in negotiating with the Allies and rulling Germany by themselves.(To say they were basically well-meaning, but very brave, amateurs is probably a fair judgment.) I wonder how much of this complexity will even be hinted at in the forthcoming movie.

comment #36

D.Z. says ...

huisache: "I gather he is portrayed as a selfless patriot who was only trying to do what was best for the people but ultimately fell a little short of his goals. Like Hitler."

Or Swamp Fox in "The Patriot"...

comment #37

BurmaShave says ...

D.Z. are you a 300 year old Native American? Shut the fuck up about Swamp Fox, that damned movie is fictional.

comment #38

frankbooth says ...

I expect that a fair number of twenty and thirty-somethings will turn out for this, if only to see what cool, Mission Impossible-style tricks Tom uses to assassinate Hitler.

comment #39

Circumvrent says ...

Jeff, did you just give away the last shot of Che? Not the "why" of it, but the "how" - and if you did, that was seriously dick.

comment #40

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