KRISTEN STEWART OWNS.
There, I took care of that for you, LexG.
Also, Limelight is a great song, but it came out in 1981.
Ryan Reynolds reminds me of Tim Matheson, whose presence, save for Animal House, was a sure sign of shittiness ahead.
God forbid there’s a comedy without one of those SNL douchebags sullying the scene. How and when SNL turned into the world’s most expensive Musical Theatre Summercamp is a mystery. Bill Hader isn’t a pimple on Piscopo’s ass, and I bet Joe had a lot of those, considering his rampant ‘roid use.
The kid was good is The Squid and The Whale though. Now that was a funny movie, the type of movie Mottola should be doing based on the talent he showed in The Daytrippers. Instead he’s doing this crap. What are the odds that everyone learns a valuable lesson by the end of the movie, and that Jewfro gets the Goyim? Uh, duh.
Can’t wait for the new Solondz. I’ve had enough of these “edgy” indie film poseurs. At least Solondz brings the bite.
Unless I was 15. But then again, isn’t that true of almost every movie? Isn’t that why TDK is being bandied about as a Best Picture candidate? Actually, the more I think about it, the more I agree that TDK should win Best Picture. That’s the movie that best represents American film circa 08: loud, incoherent and possessed of a philosophical logic similar to that of a freshman in college whose just discovered that Red Bull and Ayn Rand are a wicked combo during those lulls when it seems as if no one in the world is ever going to be my friend again, so I’m just going to sit in my room because I don’t need anybody, I said! I don’t need anybody!
i know this is true of a lot of people, but still…
kristen stewart would look RIDICULOUSLY ODD without hair.
think about it.
KRISTEN STEWART COMMANDS YOU.
Like a combination of The Mighty Zeus, Marlon Brando, Marilyn Monroe, and Scarlett Johansson combined with the glowing 1983 creature from MICHAEL MANN’S THE KEEP, K-STEW *RULES* your Universe and you should TREMBLE in her presence.
Get on your kneels and BOW.
This will make 125 million because the world is no longer able to resist the power of KRISTEN STEWART.
OH MY GOD IS SHE AWWWWWWESOME.
This looks like 1987 from the point of view of someone who was either comatose during most of the decade or was clearly born after 1987. It has that same indiscernable “When the fuck is this happening? ” that SUPERBAD had for much of its duration.
And he’s supposed to be a college graduate? What? Why does he look the same age as every highschooler working there? What’s with the reverential beer hand-off?
This thing has SUCK written all over it.
BMC, you’re not BOWING.
Am I the only one who remembers when Kristen Stewart played Jodie Foster’s son in PANIC ROOM?
Huh. Thought it looked pretty damned enjoyable for a Hollywood comedy. You guys need to have more fun.
Milkman – epic fail on the Tim Matheson hate, he was also major player in Fletch.
Burmashave – I wonder how many guys of a certain impressionable age will have their sexual orientation seriously thrown out of balance when they realize that about her LOL
Uh, Stewart’s character name in PANIC ROOM was “Sarah.” Unless this is “A Boy Named Sue” territory here…
I worked at a park similar to this in the summer of 1988, and I don’t remember this many hijinks. I’d be more confident in this if I had liked SUPERBAD. That said, there were a few laughs, and I do like Stewart.
I like it when people claim that THE DARK KNIGHT is only for 19 year-old fanboys — It’s ‘The Zacharek Defense’
I laughed. As LND said, it might be enjoyable.
Limelight never goes out of style.
“Solondz brings the bite”
Yes he does: in the worst possible way.
Solondz is shite.
That was really, really dull and average.
Lex – My guess is that she has a VERY small part in this thing and they are trying to maximize her presence while the TWILIGHT iron is still hot.
She does look very cute in this, but the movie looks like a weak, runny turd.
Don’t think for a moment that she appears at the exact halfway point in the trailer (the default YouTube screen-grab) by accident.
Milkman, you seem like the occasionally cogent sort, so permit me to say that your recent head injury and ensuing brain trauma must be the reason you think Joe “Two Films And Gone” Piscopo is some sort of standard-bearer to hold up in conversation as the best SNL had to offer.
Bill Hader’s genuinely gifted. I don’t think that’s always true of SNL graduates, but you’ll be seeing this guy in movies for the next 20 years. Meanwhile, if you want to see Piscopo, he’ll be stopping by to deliver a pizza at my house in the next hour, so at least he’s working, right?
What is wrong with you people? I saw this film at a test screening and it was great! Kristin Stewart does not have a small part that they are trying to capitalize on, she has the female lead! And this trailer is just an attempt to market it to the masses. The film is a beautiful coming of age story that isn’t hollywood mainstream. It’s so lame that so many cranky know it alls would make all these false pronouncements based on a trailer!
Jesse Eisenberg has one of the most irritating faces in modern cinema; This kid has bugged me since Roger Dodger.
JESSE EISENBERG is a MASSIVE no-charisma megadouche who I can’t imagine has ONE FAN out there in the world, but like every single member of SAG who’s lucky enough to snare the lead in some precious smug indie, he’ll manage to work in mid-budget, unsuccessful movies for two decades to the rest of the world’s COMPLETE INDIFFERENCE;
See also, a whole slew of actors like Aaron Stanford and Jesse Bradford and Ashton Holmes and Sean Ashmore who NOT ONE PAYING MOVIEGOER IN AMERICA could pick out of a fucking POLICE LINEUP, but never seem to want for work.
And though I think this next dude is likeable enough and he certainly rocks the huge, bigtime surname, I daresay no one has ever actively paid to see a movie because Colin Hanks was in it.
In any case, resume bowing.
Burma- Brilliant, sir. Thank you for that.
Oh, and as for the movie, I’m getting a serious “Outside Providence” vibe, but that just might be the font choice and Miramax logo.
Leave it to MilkMan to sum up exactly what’s what with TDK. Now that I’ve read his critique, I believe he’s right. TDK should win best picture.
By the way, do you think producers cast Ryan Reynolds because they hope ScarJo will come and hang around the set? I can’t think of many other reasons.
May I just reiterate how completely lame and strangely embittered it is to claim to know so much about this film based on a trailer! Trailers are used to market movies and film studios do whatever they can to sell a film to the audience they think will provide them with the most cash. The film is great but I’ll let it speak for itself. As for Jesse Eisenberg — I find it bizarre the amount of aggression wasted on this subject. I happen to love him and always have (Roger Dodger, The Squid and the Whale) — if you don’t fine. But the degree of venom expended at expressing your dislike of him as an actor leads one to believe that this has nothing to do with acting ability. I mean, there are actors I like and dislike but none who I could work up such bitterness and nastiness about. He’s a good actor, if you don’t care for him fine. But I gotta wonder what is wrong in your life that you are so bitter?
I was with you too Burmashave.
Anyone who saw Panic Room and didn’t think Kirsten Stewart was a boy for the first 20 minutes is a liar.
I can’t believe MilkMan is picking on poor Tim Matheson. Only did Animal House? Come on – who doesn’t love Fletch?
Damn – rereading the thread I see Deathtongue beat me to the Fletch thing. Still, we need to represent.
Anyway, movie looks fun enough PLUS it’s got Rush, PLUS it’s got Martin Starr (one of the few Freaks & Geeks people to not get his own franchise yet).
However, I invoke the rule that any 1980s song used in Grosse Point Blank should be banned from use in 1980s-era movie trailers. I’m looking at you, “Blister in the Sun.”
Oh, it’s not like that song was a daring choice in 1997, David.
Having said that, “Cities in Dust” and “We Care a Lot” are two real gems on that soundtrack. Nice, deep 80s cuts there.
Oh, and LexG fell in love with Kristen Stewart during his first viewing of “Panic Room.”
That is all.
Sadie – “Coming of Age?” What degree of social retardation drags a coming of age story to post-college graduation? And as for Eisenberg, you happen to love him and always have – thus the clouded judgement of your opinion. I’m with LexG on his roster on non-entities. The only schlub he left off was Anton Yelchin.
bmcintire – I must say you prove my point because the bitterness with which you express yourself on this subject is so wholly disproportionate to what you are actually speaking about. This is a movie trailer and an actor. You don’t like the trailer. Fine. I saw the movie and I loved it. We don’t agree on the actor or the film (not that you know of which you speak since you base it on a trailer). But my judgement is not clouded. My esteem for any actor or actress does not cloud my judgement of their performances. Again, you don’t care for him? Fine. But it’s your ego that forbids you from seeing this as your mere subjective opinion and nothing more.
sadiemay: My judgement is not clouded.
Everyone’s judgements are clouded, because no, save you of course, is excempt from perceiving the world in a subjective manner.
And bcm is the one with the “ego” problem? That’s funny. You sound like you have a monster fucking ego.
And if you don’t want heated, passionate, and sometimes ridiculous discourse, go to Starbucks and strike up a conversation with the person sitting next to you. I’d rather read bcm’s comments than your weak attempts at being “objective,” whatever that is. Good luck with being the smartest person who ever lived.
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