Piven Turns Tail

What the hell is a “high mercury count“? Whatever it is, it reportedly caused Jeremy Piven to abruptly end his run in Broadway’s Speed-the-Plow after missing Tuesday evening’s performance and a Wednesday matinee. I thought this was a put-on after reading David Mamet‘s comment that he had spoken to Piven and was told “that he discovered that he had a very high level of mercury…so my understanding is that he is leaving show business to pursue a career as a thermometer.” This is the lamest cop-out excuse I’ve ever heard from any shirker in any profession in my entire life. It’s on the level of “my dog ate my homework.”

  • Ryansi51

    i love the ari gold character and try to like piven but he just seems like such an insufferable ass its unbelievable.

  • Captain EasyChord

    I think he realized that being in a Broadway play means that he can’t stay out until 4 a.m. every night trying to bang girls half his age at Bungalow 8.

  • Sabina E

    hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

    mercury level rising???? My ass…. what a douche.

  • Rich S.

    That is presumably a rectal thermometer.

  • Moises Chiullan

    His replacements are to be William H Macy and Norbert Leo Butz (Tony winner for those who don’t know).

  • actionman

    I am so fucking pissed about this. I have tix for this Saturday’s matinee and I bought them (more or less) because of Piven’s involvement. I’ve read the play and seen it on stage before, and as with anything Mamet, I’m a huge fan. But this was a chance to see not only Ari Gold in person, but to see him interact with Peggy Olson from Mad Men.

    And now it looks like Bill Macy is going to replace him — but not till mid-Jan. Some guy named Jordan Lange is filling in this weekend for a few shows. He has some Mamet on his resume so I assume he’ll be good. But this reeks of bull-shit to me.

    And also, it must be said, this doctor that advised Piven to leave the show, is the same ASSHOLE who I worked with on a reality television show a few years ago. He was an insufferable, egomaniacal douche bag and one of the worst people I ever had to deal with in the six years that I worked in the entertainment industry. Go do some more roids, Colker, you imbecile.

    Now I feel a little better.

  • actionman

    And this incident should make for great fodder in Mamet’s next Hollywood-bashing book. Can’t wait to get the inside deets.

  • Billy Joel

    It’s obvious the play got in the way of the partying.

    Surprising, because Gold, err, Piven comes from a family of stage actors, who take their craft seriously.

    My mom saw the play with Piven a month back. Said it was just ok. Nothing spectacular. 1 Act. No intermission.

    PS: typekey still sucks.

  • Geoff

    I just remember Piven on TV after the Emmy’s(?).

    He was excited and running around interviewing people and asking how they felt about him being on stage.

  • http://www.suburbanvoodoo.blogspot.com rgmax99

    Mamet’s thermometer comment is priceless.

    He rules.

  • p.Vice

    You worked in reality TV, action? Your hatred of me is starting to make sense…

  • CMAC

    The mercury thing is actually a real thing. Whether Piven has it or not, is unknown.

    I know a woman (an actor, funnily enough) who was having a series of serious ailments that eventually landed her in the hospital. It was crazy. She had wild mood swings (and no not her period) and became very depressed among the numerous physical ailments. One being, her jaw was paralized and ps? She was doing a play at the time and couldn’t open her mouth to speak. (You wanna guess how freaky THAT is? On stage, can’t fucking open your mouth cause your jaw is locked…try it sometime. )

    Major league fuck over. It turned out her old school fillings were disintegrating and leaking into her body. Who knew? She came close to dying. And it was a fluke that the doctors picked it up. They were treating her for everything else. AND, it had gone for almost a year.

    Now maybe Piven IS an asshole in real life and a prick and just wants to party and get laid and get tons of money for TV and movies, who wouldn’t. Most Hollywood stars ARE pricks and assholes. (I know I’ve worked with a few)

    But, if he IS sick with Mercury poisoning, he’s pretty fucked at this moment and it ain’t no party.

  • CMAC

    Oops meant “gone ON for almost a year”

  • actionman

    yes, Vice. I worked in reality TV and hated just about every second of it. I worked with nice people and got paid well but the product just sucked.

  • MilkMan

    I was told by a very reliable source, a writer who used to work for Playboy and whose job it was to interview him, that Piven has a very serious and dehabilitating case of Early Withdrawal Syndrome, or whatever it is that they’re calling premature ejaculation these days. I’m not kidding. I heard this come out of her mouth. She heard it from a number of girls who she tried to contact for the piece she was writing for the magazine, a piece that was killed later on.

  • MindlessObamaton

    There was a chick on HOUSE who almost died of this same thing. Serious stuff, peeps.

  • DeafBrownTrashPunk

    hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

    mercury level rising???? My ass…. what a douche.

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