Hey Hey Uncle Boonmee
The Cannes Film Festival’s Palme d’Or has gone to Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives. Which goes to show, at the very least, that it pays to stick around long enough to catch everything, right to the very end. Hoorah-goorah for Biutiful‘s Javier Bardem winning for Best Actor and Certified Copy‘s Juliette Binoche taking the Best Actress prize. [Posted from a cafe during a light rainshower.]
Actually, Bardem tied the Best Actor awards with Elio Germano for La Nostra Vita.
I can’t wait to read Manohla Dargis’ lukewarm review of this movie in the New York Times 10 months from now!
Seriously, II can’t wait to pick this DVD up at my local library two years from now and then say to myself “Naahh…”
Actually, I can’t wait to never hear about this movie ever again!
I was going to mention the La Nostra Vita guy, but I hadn’t seen it and my blood was down. No disrespect.
Called it.
She poses for the official poster and then they give her an Award. Was this year’s Cannes produced by Dick Clark?
Something about the HE font and italics, or just because of my wholesale indifference toward anything with Juliette Binoche (blecch)….
But every time I see “Certified Copy” I think it says CARBON COPY, and I get all excited that Jeff’s talking about the 1981 movie where George Segal finds out his son is Denzel Washington. Used to play every fourth movie on HBO in between GOIN’ APE, GREEN ICE, and TAKE THIS JOB AND SHOVE IT… none of which have ever been seen or heard from again. Ah, the magic of 1982 HBO.
On topic, what Prager said.
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I wonder if Lex will still like Cruise after this.
Helen Mirren video profile.
Jennifer Hudson video profile.
Inside Job guy video profile.
Bloom chomps into a Musketeer role.
The Dodgers strike back.
Douglas Q+A.
Divide teaser.
No Miramaxe for you.
Countdown to Zero director video profile.
Via Dark Horizons, they’ve really let themselves go, huh?
Fox’s replacement for TF3?
Toby went a little too ape over reboot, which is why FOX picked Franco in his place.
Swamp Thing remake sinks
Anyone want to see all three Twilight films in a row?
Who needs scalpers when you got theater chains?
Queen Latifah talks about the movies she thinks are just right.
*sigh* Eclipse music video…
A less greasy release of the musical?
Via Gawker:
How the art house film world has escaped a Bruno-esque satire is beyond us. We may remedy this by going to next year’s festival with a film about the plight of [insert obscure but worthy ethnic or national group here] directed by a one-legged bisexual who has undergone some oppression in order to get the movie made. We will ensure that the film is so slow and portentous as to be unwatchable, but that people will feel guilty about being bored because many newspapers and magazines will have told them it is reminiscent of [insert incredibly slow 1970s director who specializes in screamingly dull long takes here].
In the meantime, we’ll be watching Midnight Run and laughing every time DeNiro gets that other bounty hunter to look in the other direction so he can punch him and escape with Charles Grodin.
Cannes fucked itself this year. Way to emphasize the gap between art house and blockbuster. There’s never before been such a disparity, with no middle ground at all. The art house is pretentious wank; the blockbusters are CGI turds. It’s all shit. Films = shit.
TV = ace. But, seriously, WTF are we to think of Lost? I can’t tell if I just witnessed one of the more beautiful television episodes of my life, or if I just had six years of my actual life raped by a pair of nerds.
I liked the final shot, but I didn’t really care for “Lost” that much tonight, which is a shame because I actually thought Season 6 was decent to this point.
Of course everyone’s going to ask me how I would have ended it and I’ll reply, “after Season 3″.
I kind of think it was genius. In a way. Of course I want to know the answers to all those minor questions, but I think the whole point of Lost was to be constantly asking questions. They made it clear the island was Something Important that Needed To Be Protected, and they followed through with that. The rest? Up to us. Yes, maddening in some ways. But remarkably brave. I think there’ll be an absolute 50-50 split between lovers and haters or this show.
To quote John Doe: “What I’ve done is going to be puzzled over and studied and followed… forever.”
Nearly every TV show (okay, to specify, drama) should end after 3 seasons, max. No exceptions.
If you can’t wrap up a narrative after 60-75 episodes, you’re just stringing everyone along and treading water.
Inception literally carries the hopes of the year 2010 in film on its shoulders. If it disappoints, the whole year has been a write-off. What a dismal year for film. No wonder nobody goes to the cinema anymore. It’s all shit.
Anyway – LOST. Awesome.
Kaned: The Wire’s best season was season four. And Deadwood ended after season three and needed a fourth.
I’ve never talked to anybody who thinks ‘The Shield’ ran too long; that was, what, seven? eight?
Feel totally left out that a HUGE watershed pop culture moment on par with the Super Bowl, the Oscars, the last MASH, Roots, etc etc etc is going on right now as I type this, and… I can’t watch it ’cause I stalled out somewhere near the beginning of season four. Was so invested in it for those first couple years, wish I could at least take a peek and see how it all ended, but such is the annoyance of modern “serialized” TV– can’t miss a single act of any one episode and not miss some huge deal. Got S4 and S5 right here on a stack, so… sometime around fall 2013 I’ll let you know what I thought of the LOST finale.
Everyone talks up The Wire, but The Shield is the TV cop show that stayed consistent and true to itself from awesome opener to devastating finale. Seven seasons.
Fuck Gawker. Fuck the haters. Joe forever.
Eloi: I’m not writing off the year until Expendables. Inception has to disappoint, because it carries too much weight on its shoulders and Ellen Page is in it. As for Lost, hopefully, that new Hulu “deal” will still let me go back and finish the series for free.
DeeZee, while we’re all grateful you’re going to see an actual movie, you really do have the weirdest taste ever.
I’m all for subverting movie snob expectations and embracing pulp, and I’m CAPTAIN STALLONE so I’m all about it too, but The Expendables is SO, SO fucking minor… How could anyone who in any way loves or even LIKES film have THE EXPENDABLES as the one and ONLY movie on which to pin their hopes for the remainder of the filmic year? Even Stallone doesn’t want you to like it that much.
DeeZee in May 1995, with Seven, Nixon, Heat, Casino, Dead Man Walking, Strange Days, Leaving Las Vegas, etc etc all yet to drop by year’s end:
“I’m not writing off the year until Nick of Time.”
I just have to ask this, since there’s so much populist hostility and blind philistinism going on here.
To George Prager and LexG and Eloi Wrath: have any of you ever seen a film by Apichatpong Weerasethakul? You go out of your way, upon hearing that it won Cannes, to slam the film and slam anyone who might like the film, and dismiss it as yet another art house movie that real Americans don’t like–another sign that Cannes is out of touch with what EVERYONE really likes.
But have you ever seen a film by him? By Abbas Kiarostami? (Eloi Wrath doesn’t need to answer this, because I know the answer. Okay, LexG too, because he’s decided in life to aim way below his own IQ. Maybe this is just aimed at George Prager.)
According to Eloi Wrath, who’ll chime in even (or especially) when he has no clue what he’s talking about, the art house selections at Cannes this year are “pretentious wank,” but what films are included in that? CARLOS? The Doug Liman film? The Inarritu film? Exactly what the hell are you guys actually railing against? If you’re so loathe to see any of these films, why bother writing anything at all? Are you worried the readers of Hollywood Elsewhere might suspect you aren’t in the, um, majority?
Also, to Matt Cousens: that Gawker post, which is getting butt-raped in the comments section, is one of the dumbest they’ve posted in a long while. Their writers don’t actually sample the culture they claim to know so much about.
John M: An entire film festival takes place, over two weeks, and you can name three films than aren’t pretentious wank? You just answered your own question, you pretentious wanker.
John M:
I don’t watch Indian or Asian movies. Because I don’t give a shit.
The only “Asian cinema” I want to see is in my porn collection. All that Assayas, Innaritu type stuff, yes, of course I see all that.
I have three degrees.
Nolan is vastly more pretentious than Apichatpong
Bob Violence: Yeah, I forgot Apichatpong made the biggest superhero film of all time. Nolan, that obscure motherfucker.
I wouldn’t know because I’m not gonna watch some Thai bullshit just to make myself feel smarter about myself because it depicts another culture and has subtitles.
Plus when you go to a foreign movie from some far-off land at the arthouse, it’s like a CUE for all the people of that nationality to show up and TALK ALL THE WAY THROUGH IT.
Or it’s a cue for no one to show up except one white douche.
Bob Violence: Yeah, I forgot Apichatpong made the biggest superhero film of all time. Nolan, that obscure motherfucker.
uh I didn’t say anything about “obscurity”
Eloi Wrath called me “pretentious.” How will I get through this?
I named three films off the top of my head, you mouthbreathing shitbird. Add in POETRY, TOURNEE, HA HA HA, etc….clearly you’ve read up on them, so tell me: pretentious wank or not?
Or try this: don’t go out of your way to insult films and filmmakers you aren’t familiar with and have no interest in seeing in the first place. It just makes you sound like an anti-intellectual, reactionary twat.
signed,
a pretentious artsy-fartsy wanky elitist
I think LexG makes some compelling arguments though
poll time: what is the most pretentious Asian porno you’ve seen
“I wouldn’t know because I’m not gonna watch some Thai bullshit just to make myself feel smarter about myself because it depicts another culture and has subtitles.”
Man, there are some major mischaracterizations going on around here.
This thread has just confirmed why I don’t bother to go to art house films anymore. If it’s good enough, it’ll cross over. If it isn’t, I’ll have to sit next to some eczema-having motherfucker like John M for four hours.
Jesus Christ. Don’t any of you shits ever feel like having fun? Do you always need your intellect to be stimulated when you see a film? Do any of you have actual jobs where your intellect is stimulated daily and you just want to relax after you leave the office?
Christ. I bet you all turn down sex in favour of “conversation”.
waaaaaaaah
“Do you always need your intellect to be stimulated when you see a film?”
Answer: when did I ever say that? Did I ever argue for the abolition of light entertainment? Nope.
John M: Do you think I’d be be posting on HE if I was a “mouthbreathing” anti-intellectual, completely uninterested in cinema in all of its variety? I could just post at AICN if I was only interested in fanboy properties and action films, but I’m clearly not, and clearly neither is LexG. Yet you’d prefer to characterize us both as idiots because we’re not bowing down and worshipping the utterly dry efforts at Cannes this year.
It was a SHIT festival. Everyone agrees. Nothing grabbed the imagination, nothing made an impact. None of the films at Cannes this year will be remembered, and that’s what drives you mad, because you want to be the guy who’s always at the forefront of culture. Yet today you’re defending a bunch of fucking desperately mediocre foreign films just so you can feel superior on an internet message board.
LexG is the Ignatius J. Reilly of the new millennium and I mean that in a good way
Do you think I’d be be posting on HE if I was a “mouthbreathing” anti-intellectual, completely uninterested in cinema in all of its variety?
uh
John M,
What did you think of that one where Juliette Binoche is a HARRIED SINGLE MOM and we’re to weep for her frazzled, put-upon predicaments as she struggles to raise a whimsical, red-balloon-obsessed child while making ends meet as… an obscure marionettist doing Chinese puppet shows in multicultural Paris?
I believe the title was: BITCH GET A BETTER JOB.
Eloi Wrath: The consensus on Boonmee seems to be that it’s incredible.
Also, what the fuck is up with this thread? There’s A LOT more reverse snobbery going on here than actual snobbery. You know, you guys should probably watch the Apichatpong before calling it ‘bullshit’.
Wow, you’re a master of hyperbolic dichotomies, aren’t you, Eloi?
Yes, I want you all to BOW DOWN to art house pretension, because I am SUPERIOR.
(And I hate to break this to you, but LexG spends most of his time passionately defending “fanboy properties and action films”–that’s his stock in trade.)
And please tell me the last time blogs DIDN’T whine for days and days about Cannes? It’s become an annual hobby for film writers like Wells: fly to Cannes to bitch and moan about Jean-Luc Godard, etc. Of course, your line of thinking has it that if you LIKE Jean-Luc Godard, you must be an insecure, sniveling nerd, because EVERYONE knows this was a shit festival full of “a bunch of fucking desperately mediocre foreign films” like FILM SOCIALISME. “Desperately mediocre,” by the way, is, in my opinion, a wonderful way to describe IRON MAN 2.
I mean, your mind’s made up: why bother with the high blood pressure?
Lex: Well, IM 2 was always going to suffer from Howard leaving, while Toy Story 3 is clearly going to be redundant, and maybe even obsolete. So nothing else really actually looks like *fun* besides Expendables. That’s a word Hollywood seems to have forgotten as it keeps circle-jerking to films it deems “important” or “big”. I never did get around to Shutter Island and She’s Out of My League, though. It’s funny you should mention ’95, though, since I unfortunately saw Judge Dredd and Clueless back then[Was ok with Mallrats.], while I rented Seven and 12 Monkeys, and heard good things about Clockers, but avoided, because it seemed too much like a QT-wannabe, even though I knew he was a wannabe, too. I avoided Dead Man Walking, ‘cus I couldn’t tell it apart from the ad campaigns for Silence of the Lambs and Shawshank. I kind of wish I’d seen The Usual Suspects, but after Superman Returns(and probably Apt Pupil), I’m wondering if it wasn’t overrated. Anyway, Nick of Time just seemed like a Speed-wannabe with Depp instead of Keanu.[Though I'll be honest and admit to seeing Johnny Mnemonic, because I was on a cyberpunk kick after playing the S-NES port of Shadowrun.] I did like Toy Story, until Pixar started making all their cartoons like it. Didn’t care about Casino because Stone and Pesci’s 15 minutes were up by then. Leaving Las Vegas seemed like a self-important Boomer film, and Strange Days seemed like a self-important Gen X film, so I passed on both.
So, um, yeah. Fifteen years later, they’ve managed to make films which combine the the fluff, pomposity, and shitty pacing which I would’ve either avoided or at least only been exposed to in smaller doses in the prior decade and a half. Therefore, I’m hoping Expendables will cut out all the bullshit and give me something I’d actually like to watch more than once again. I think Black Dynamite was the last film which fit that category. And I guess I’m not the only one, as Eloi seems to be saying the same thing before I finished.
Lex, I actually did like Flight of the Red Balloon.
AND I liked your joke.
Imagine…one can like both an art house film and a stupid little joke…
Why can’t someone like some (but not all) art house films, some (but not all) mainstream dramas and some (but not all) popcorn films? Why is it that you have to be either Joe Popcorn or a pretentious wanker?
“Why is it that you have to be either Joe Popcorn or a pretentious wanker?”
Because this is the internet and false dichotomies are easy.
John M: I don’t even know what to say any more. You don’t seem to have an actual opinion on film; just a dislike of me. And for the record I wrote a fairly long post about how I thought Iron Man 2 was desperately mediocre, so pick another example when you try to out me as a philistine.
Rubbish argument, rubbish poster.
re: Nick of Time … the best film I have ever seen that is set in “real time” is Cash On Demand
Well, we agree on IRON MAN 2. (I was sad to dislike ROBIN HOOD even more…though that mediocrity was more elaborate than desperate.)
This thread isn’t an argument about specific films, because none of them have come out yet. It’s an argument about how we as viewers approach art and entertainment. You guys own the threads here–I’m just curious why you never pass up an opportunity to slam things you regard as too out of the mainstream. It seems unnecessary, at times even thuggish. If there’s one thing the internet does not need more of, it’s militant conformity.
This thread is amazing; I was expecting this sudden influx of thirty new posts to be about ‘Lost’, instead, everybody’s getting passionately insulting about Cannes! Suddenly, the genius of Wells’s master plan falls into place.
John M.:
Yeah, but usually when I “talk up” some big dumb blockbuster, it’s because it co-stars some chick I want to bang. If it’s a Scott or a Mann, directors I genuinely love and respect, I’m being more on the level than if I’m talking up JONAH HEX like it’s the second coming. I’m really not more than a casual fan of the brainless shininess of, say, Iron Man of Spider-Man or X-Men… not really a geek, so I’m far from the loudest trumpeter of any of those franchises. Usually it really does come down to “I want to bang Kirsten Dunst” more than any lifelong fanboy obsession with Spider-Man.
And I see a lot of different stuff, from mumblecore to British gangster movies to firebrand Mexican-shot polemics… But I have a giant blind spot where it comes to Bollywood and Asian cinema. I’d work up a better explanation for that, but basically, as I said above: Just not interested.
Most Eastern culture-clash type movies about arcane traditions and the like… just nothing I’m ever interested in. And on the flip side, all that over-the-top show-off HK action crap, which many assume would be right up my alley– again, don’t care.
I think what I am trying to say is simple:
Asian and Indian people are lame.
I appreciate your honesty, Lex. And yeah, weird, I woulda thought John Woo would’ve been your cup of tea.
And to Eloi Wrath: I regret the namecalling here and in other threads, especially “mouthbreathing.” But I gotta be honest: you always manage to say something that completely sets me off. Even down to the eczema comment…because, yes, I have eczema. Am I satisfying some notion of a Wellsian film dweeb in your head? Well, okay, fine. I’M DAMN PROUD OF MY ECZEMA.
If any of you “mouthbreathers” have been convinced by this thread to try out one of Apitchatpong’s movies, do NOT start with the one that’s half about gay kids and half about the guy thinking he’s a tiger.
“Asian and Indian people are lame.”
China pop. 1-billion plus …. India pop. 1-billion plus … America pop 300 mill approx. – there are more people in India who speak english than there are in america total. although they speak Oxford english and we speak Webster english …. america as a dominant power is over end of story, the greatest studio movies have all been made … all we can hope for are good performances in cool films
I’ve figured it out: Lex is trying to bait DeafBrown into another fiery flirtation.
John M: I regret the eczema comment. I have just downed a case of Samuel Adams, and am writing with more vitriol than usual.
Overall, I just disagree with the idea that I/we “never pass up an opportunity to slam things you regard as too out of the mainstream”. I really don’t think that’s true. As I said before, I don’t think anyone on HE is content to simply look within the mainstream. I just think that the traditional avenues that lie outside of the mainstream – foreign imports, indie films, film festivals – have been so consistently mediocre for the last few years that it’s hard to defend them anymore.
Wells himself was clearly more keen on seeing Fair Game and the chance of Inception than any of the competition films.
The industry has become so polarized. Massive, absurd spectacles, or tiny, insignificant, inconsequential indies that nobody gives a damn about. It’s depressing altogether. We get the choice of Sam Worthington battling CGI beasties, or Ryan Gosling mumbling about how unhappy he is. There’s no middle ground.
I apologize for the rude comments.
Honestly, the eczema comment didn’t offend me so much as worry me that all you commenters could somehow see me through my fiber-optics…like Matrix-esque paranoia. It made me laugh, actually–no worries.
And yes, I totally agree that the industry has become polarized. The middle has dropped out, and I hope that’s not a permanent condition. On that note, definitely looking forward to INCEPTION, and hope it does well.
Hey, Eloi, I just saw that crazy Megan Fox thread, and I wanted to throw in my two cents about Kaminski shooting ‘Schindler’s List’.
I’m pretty sure that at least one major factor in the decision was that Kaminski could speak Polish and, thus, could communicate with the crew shooting in Poland.
Which is one of those amazing things — he steps up and delivers and they forge an artistic partnership, but it begins with a simple linguistic need.
Spielberg picked Kaminski for one reason only:
He’s a HUGE “Cool as Ice” fan.
I’ve said it before, Deaf Brown is *SMOKING* hot, but given her militant politics and incendiary blog, probably not worth the decade on a government watch list if you email her.
Lex: More importantly, what is your view on Cool as Ice?
Lex: And how come you didn’t make any comment on the Katie Holmes pic?
Deez: I will never, ever, EVER say anything bad about Cruise or Mrs. Cruise. That sounds like I’m pulling a shtick, but I’m not. I have SO MUCH reverence for Tom Cruise, unironically so, it’s practically religion to me. I have never, would never, and will never say a negative word about the guy or his awesome wife. I’ve said it before and it’s true… since age 15, I have been in absolute AWE of the guy and he’s in every sense my personal IDOL, in much the way people worship Reagan, or Kennedy, or Jesus.
I’ve very, very, very seriously considered looking into Scientology many times over the years. I find it interesting and seem to agree with a lot of its tenets. And though I’m probably too atheistic and secular to ever join up, I don’t find it any weirder or less valid than any other religion. Not that anyone brought that up, but just felt like saying it.
COOL AS ICE ? I’ve seen it once all the way through, bits and pieces of it a couple other times. One of those things you WANT to be really, really funny… but it’s just sort of stupid and boring. And I was a MASSIVE Vanilla Ice fan back in the day, as I might’ve mentioned before. That whole ’89-’92 era of hip-hop crossover, or, for lack of a more PC word, the “early wigger” era where every redneck suburban white kid in places like Ohio and Iowa with a cheek of Copenhagen suddenly busted out CROSS COLOURS and Newports and started talking like N2DEEP– that’s an era of seismic cultural shift that really should be more thoroughly documented, in film, in literature, than it has been. Back in the day I had my semi mullet with shaved stripes and pegged HAMMER PANTS, and our dance crew would run out into traffic to bust moves to Humpty Hump or DEEPER SHADE OF SOUL and GLENN MEDEIROS FEATURING BOBBY BROWN, and then bump slow jams like SURFACE and TIMMY T and STEVIE B and Tommy Paige…
And Vanilla Ice was like the fucking GOD of that scene; Of course he was a joke within a few months, but always thought the guy had mad pathos and, actually, a shitload of charisma. Someone needs to do a Tarantino move and put Rob Van Winkle in a supporting role in a crime epic… I’d all but guarantee he’d rock that shit.
Ok, I’ll admit I liked that era, too. I think it was the last time they had music I could stand before we got stuck with grunge, rap metal, whatever the fuck you called Celine Dion’s music, and Lilith Fair-esque music, among others.
Speaking of Lost, I’m wondering if the reaction to the last episode won’t end up hurting MI IV and/or Super 8.
I have no idea what’s happening here anymore. But I’ll just say since it’s relevant again, you can still watch Joe’s short “A Letter to Uncle Boonmee” over at the Auteurs website (or whatever it’s technically called now) for a measly $1. It’s a 17 minute short from last year that’s a part of his ‘Primitive’ art installation project that includes this new feature film as well as Phantoms of Nabua which you can also view for free with a quick google search. But yeah, A Letter to… is well worth the price of admission, as it’s fucking breathtaking and a uniquely related sort of introduction to the film that just won the Palm.
Via Roger Ebert’s Twitter, Brittany Murphy’s husband dead.
I hope an allegedly great LOST finale makes up for THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN THE HISTORY OF TOP MODEL, ie REINA, losing out on the ANTM finale to loathesome, old-ass KRISTA because Tyra felt like playing the “every other season” race card this cycle.
REINA POWER LOVE HER SOOOOO MUCH, the Lexiest chick EVER, so sweet and demure and STUNNING.
wow, okay, I don’t know that anybody’s ever said this before, and I hesitate to do so because of what it might unleash… but thank you for that news, DZ, which was both interesting and informative (and, as a true novelty, you summarized it correctly!).
The LOST finale was VERY satisfying. One of the best shows ever. Thank you.
DE RAVIN POWER.
Hope they showed her feet a lot.
Weirdest thing ever to me, as someone who checked out of LOST in S3: That somehow Michael Emerson is the “face of LOST” as the “main guy” or something. Ben? Didn’t exist on S1. Was he even in S2? The guy’s great and all, but the ever-changing roster of LOST always seemed to me a sign they were pulling it out their ass sometimes. To my literalist mind, anyone who wasn’t in the first season was just brought on TO DRAG IT OUT, from the Tailies to Ben to Desmond.
Of course I’m TOTALLY wrong about this, as all those dudes became the heart of the show, but to me, a S1 purist, it always seemed weird that Shannon and Boone were shuffled off early and forgotten, and it became THE BEN SHOW.
It’d be like if the guy who played BILLINGS suddenly became the KEY to THE SHIELD, and Goggins and Chiklis were back-burnered in the back end of the show.
Lex, don’t bother with LOST. It’s clearly beneath you.
You’re an easy lay, HHH.
*”LOST” SPOLIER ALERT*
So you’re telling me the island was purgatory, after all?
*END “LOST” SPOILERS*
Gee, I didn’t see that one coming, like, 6 years ago. Hope you enjoyed the “mysterious” 120 hours of programming to achieve foregone conclusion.
no, the island wasn’t.
So what was, then?
I haven’t seen the show since its first season, but people have been arguing it about work today, and nobody seems to really know for certain. Although almost everyone agrees that some kind of convergence between the characters on the island and their alter-egos of the “sideways world” would have made for a much more fulfilling ending.
For a show that really tried to sell the mystery as its raison d’etre, it seems like the writers really dropped the ball.
Like X-Files before it.
The island was real.
Jack’s dad explained it: the flash-sideways was a place that the castaways created as a way to reunite before ascending to heaven. (Sort of purgatory, but not necessarily.) It was timeless – meaning that they arrived there once they died – be it on the island or fifty years after they left. That was why Kate said she had been waiting a long time – it was implied that she lived a full life after leaving the island. (That’s also why Hurley told Ben that he had been a great #2.)
Good finale. I know people are upset because it didn’t happen the way they wanted it to, but hey, you can’t please everyone. I’m sure it will be debated for the next several days or so, but it’s over. My only question…what happened to Dharma?
Inception spoiler and Lost spoiler: They’re both about a guy who loved going to Hollywood Elsewhere for smart film culture insights and updates amid a refreshing brisk debate about filmmaking of all kinds then he stumbled into this string and had his memory washed clean because he couldn’t stand the implications of what he had read. He returns the next day and reads HE again, pretending none of this happened.
SPOILER: In a future installment it is revealed that this site has been hijacked by teabaggers who are then revealed to work in the studio publicity departments and their mission to stifle all filmic options other than the corporate comicbook diversions that have been approved by the secret council of the Bilderbergs.
And the radicals wearing Nic Roeg masks run through the studio boardrooms tossing the lifesucking ipads loaded with high concept blockbuster pitches out the windows and screaming “VIVA CANNES! GLOBAL FILM DIVERSITY FOREVER!!!!”
The End
PS: I saw Jeff in Cannes and I know he is One Of Us.
I thought the finale was interesting to say the least.
Jeff could you post your “Simon Monkack” is dead piece so that Hickenlooper can show up and do a dance on the guy’s grave for out living him?
Citizen,
You’re too smart a guy to take the word of people you work with. The finale was brilliant, the island was absolutely a real place (not purgatory). Everything that happened on the island really happened.
Uglyredhonda said it well a few posts above mine.
Chinaski
Why haven’t you taken your life yet you sad shit?
Hey! I had a dismissing comment about Lost and it was deleted along with the spammer. I feel bad.
What the heck is up with the reviewers in the LA Times and the NY Times both taking the LOST finale as suggesting that all the characters died in the plane crash? Didn’t they specifically dismiss that allegation in the Church scene (“Some died before you. Some died long after you.”)?
You can love or hate the LOST finale for your own reasons but it seems patently ridiculous to dislike it for being something it clearly wasn’t.
“What the heck is up with the reviewers in the LA Times and the NY Times … ?”
Besides being dumbfucks who weren’t paying attention? No idea.
Mike Hale is a prick. Period.
“Chinaski
Why haven’t you taken your life yet you sad shit?”
Because I’m not a fat fuck, married to a talentless ugly wife, wasting my life producing bullshit cotton candy movies.
Oh, you can add “ugly” before “fat”. And then add “with a dick like an elevator button” after “fuck”.
And I could go into more details about what’s wrong with your wife, but I won’t.
Chinaski, really I have no issues with you, and I’m not in this so I should stay out… but that is some really, REALLY heinous shit bringing some guy’s wife into it. Over some message board ball-busting. Damn, dude… That’s fucking evil. What if there were pics of your girl, your mom, your family, your kids if you have them, floating around the Web, and some MESSAGE BOARD guy started laying into them over a dumb difference of opinion about movies?
Too hostile, bro…
Who started it Lex?
Read what he wrote. I know you have your head up Don’s ass, but try not to be biased.
Don talks shit about me and my life (of which he has zero knowledge, or so he thinks) all the time.
Don’t talk it if you can’t take it.
And I will say that for him, his wife is far out of his league. But she’s still no better than a 3.
I’ll concede I could be wrong, but DM is bagging on you in a nebulous, anonymous-guy-on-a-blog sense… I doubt he knows your name or what your life is really like. Whereas you’re actively looking up pics of his family members for ammunition, no?
Not entirely. I know his wife, in a friend of a friend kind of way.
But yes, I’ve seen more recent pictures of her online. She actually looked better before the…I’ll let that lie there.
Where I’m from, and I’d guess where you’re from it’s the same, you talk shit on the schoolyard you need to be ready to get punched in the fucking nose.
Don has a big mouth, talks shit to anybody that he feels like, and goes way over an accepted “talking shit on a blog” line.
Yeah, pics of Don Murphy alone provide enough ammunition to last a lifetime. No need to drag the guy’s poor wife into it. She’s got things bad enough as it is. She’s married to Don Murphy for fuck’s sake. Imagine trying to live with that.
Why is anyone even taking Eloi Wrath remotely seriously? He literally doesn’t know what the word “pretentious” means. He equated it with obscurity of all things. And yes, though both of them have directed films that I love, Christopher Nolan is certainly more pretentious than Apichatpong Weerasethakul. Joe’s films are certainly harder to come by, and may not be as intellectually accessible as Nolan’s (though there is *a lot* going on below the surface of The Prestige), but he does not have an ounce of pretense to him, whereas Nolan’s films (especially The Dark Night and, by all appearances, Inception) are dripping with it.
When a jackass is running around calling people pretentious, but has no idea what is means, it doesn’t carry much weight.
The Dark Night??
lol
^ You’re right. A homonym-based typo clearly negates my point. Sorry for wasting your time.
Chin – I’m with Lex on this one. You’ve got, at your disposal, the incredibly shitty movies he’s made, the ugly face he carts around, the stupid shit he says, and the widely known fact that everybody who works with him hates him. Bringing in wives is just petty and stupid. It’s fine to be an asshole, but that’s just unnecessary escalation — you’re gonna look like more of an asshole than you probably want to.
Gordon,
I see what you’re saying. But maybe you’re not aware of the things he’s said about me, and about others, in the past. Some of them he does know personally. He has said incredibly vile, sickening things to me and to many others.
Or maybe you are aware of it and still feel the way you feel.
That’s fine. I’m not worried about looking like an asshole. At the end of the day, I know my life is better than his.
Chinaski
You know Susan? I doubt it. She wouldn’t give you two seconds out of her wonderful life. And if someday she does meet you she will scorn you because she will see right through you.
Lex doesn’t “support” me or know me. But he knows you Chin. We all do. Look how quickly my accurate comment cut you right to your core and made you froth. Because you consider ending it every day don’t you? Realizing that it is never gonna get any better. That your family apologizes for you when you leave the room. You can’t take it and then to have your shrink tell you that suicide is an actual option. That must have hit you hard. Like I asked, why HAVEN’T you just done it already? Don’t project your shortcomings on to me or Lex. Don’t for god sake ask somebody like Gordon to help you. Just do it. You won’t be missed, Chin, you really won’t. Just one more guy on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams who wasn’t man enough to step up and ring the bell. Poor Chin
“You know Susan? I doubt it. She wouldn’t give you two seconds out of her wonderful life. And if someday she does meet you she will scorn you because she will see right through you.”
If that makes you feel better. I’ve known her since before your turn, and I remember her face before she…I won’t mention it.
“Look how quickly my accurate comment cut you right to your core and made you froth. ”
Seems to me I’ve been in your head since day one.
“Because you consider ending it every day don’t you? ”
Only when I’ve made the mistake of watching one of your movies, or accidentally come across a picture of you and your wife online.
“Realizing that it is never gonna get any better. That your family apologizes for you when you leave the room.”
It’s like you’re sharing personal moments from your own life. We both know you don’t have a creative bone in your body. I mean, you’re a producer. All that takes is a loud mouth, a small cock, and a lifetime of insecurity. Your family really hates you, don’t they. Keep sending them checks in the mail and they’ll keep sending the fake hugs and kisses.
“You won’t be missed, Chin, you really won’t. Just one more guy on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams who wasn’t man enough to step up and ring the bell. Poor Chin”
The sad thing is, you’re just guessing. I happen to know that nobody likes you. And that probably includes your own wife. Sad that she probably only married you to get the chance to write/direct movies. I mean, it’s possible that I’m wrong. Maybe she likes guys that run 3 spins on the scale. Maybe she enjoys your unique blend of halitosis and cum breath. Maybe she likes a small cock because she can better control you, and knows you won’t stray cause who the fuck would you stray with. Maybe she likes a guy that regularly gets his ass kicked by people much more talented than him.
Everybody has a type.
I bet you can’t even get it up anymore. Low self esteem, mixed with a less than hot wife, mixed with clogged arteries and a fat fuck body type.
Hit the treadmill, donny boy.
Chinaski, whoever you are, Don Murphy is an asshole, but you’re an animal.
These are some of the slimiest posts I’ve ever seen on HE. More please.
Love the out-of-the-blue Green Day reference Don lays on us in the midst of all this muck. It’s like Jeffrey Dahmer doing a camp-karaoke version of Maneater or something…
Chin
You make statements and implications which only establish your loneliness and sadness. You don’t know Susan at all and she’s done nothing to her face. Like I said, IF you did know her I would find you and you would be hurt in the night without a trace.
But let’s focus on you- what motivates you to be on message boards late at night trying to mock your betters? I am on here because Jeff is a friend who DOES like me and has for decades and I like him. So what he posts interests me. He doesn’t like you any more than your family likes you. I believe the term “grubby wannabe” was used. So let’s focus on you. The unpaid bills. The sleepless nights (like last night after my spot on emails, right?). How are you going to do it? Traffic? Bathtub? Rope. Just know this- the insurance people won’t suspect but your family will know. And actually thank you for it.
“You don’t know Susan at all and she’s done nothing to her face. Like I said, IF you did know her I would find you and you would be hurt in the night without a trace.”
I remember her face looking different, better. Maybe it’s just a few years of being with you that has changed it for the worse.
You’d be too distracted by the multiple donut shops and fast food restaurants that surround my neighborhood to ever get near me. And if you did get near me, it’d be over for you, Johnny.
You’d throw two punches, miss, and be out of breath. Kind of like your sex life. Two pump chump.
“what motivates you to be on message boards late at night trying to mock your betters?”
Your flaw here is that you think you’re my better…wait, no, that’s not it. Your flaw here is that you think you’re the better of anyone. You’re the purest of scum. And you hate yourself, which is why you treat everybody that isn’t you with such hateful scorn.
It’s simple psychology, really.
“I am on here because Jeff is a friend who DOES like me and has for decades and I like him. So what he posts interests me.”
I like movies. And I like Jeff’s writing. I have a feeling that if the only people that read Jeff’s site were his friends, his job would be in danger.
I doubt Jeff really likes you. He puts up with you I’m sure.
“He doesn’t like you any more than your family likes you”
My family likes me and unlike you, I don’t have to send them money to ensure they continue to like me.
” I believe the term “grubby wannabe” was used. So let’s focus on you. The unpaid bills. The sleepless nights (like last night after my spot on emails, right?). How are you going to do it? Traffic? Bathtub? Rope. Just know this- the insurance people won’t suspect but your family will know. And actually thank you for it.”
Man, you really are on the edge here, aren’t you. Projecting your own thoughts/feellings has never been more obvious.
A fat dude with a 3 for a wife and a 3 for a cock size that makes shitty movies and has to pay his wife/family/friends to be anywhere near him.
I hope your wife knows you well enough to keep the razors locked up and the bullets stashed away from the gun.
I’m not sure which headline will pop up first. Done Murphy found dead after putting a bullet in the brain. Or, Done Murphy found dead and bloated in dumpster behind McDonalds.
thank you Chinaski. I knew you couldn’t help but come back for a line by line denial. Because god forbid the internet learn that you have nothing. How laughably sad and pathetic. Case closed.
” How laughably sad and pathetic. ”
More projecting. Tell your wife hello for me. Try real hard not to let the truth I’ve laid out seep into your life, if it hasn’t already.
You are a sad, insecure, ugly fat man.
Case closed.
Hahahahahaha what is happening here!? This is some of the most beautiful bile I’ve ever seen! Holy shit man, it’s deranged in the best sense of the word!
The craziest part is, Chinaski and Don Murphy sound like two peas in a pod.
Let’s just say the mirror despises both of you equally and we can all move on.
I just played the game that Don brought to the table. And I outplayed him, because I know enough about him to point out all the hideous flaws in his life.
He was playing a guessing game. And he lost.
And by winning, you’re out of the game! Bye bye Monkey.
I was really expected Chin would bust out “hey Don… I fucked your wife” before this was done.
The cost for P90X is about three months of a paid gym membership but you get to keep the program forever
The cost for P90X is about three months of a paid gym membership but you get to keep the program forever