The Pursuitist has posted the trailer for Kenneth Branagh‘s Thor that was shown a few days ago at Comic-Con. Branagh + Thor = whore. You can’t tell me that an esteemed middle-aged British actor-director who knows from William Shakespeare did this film for any other reason than a large stinking paycheck, or that he didn’t retire to his hotel room every night during shooting and throw up.
Look at Chris Hemsworth — the brawn, the blonde hair, the Nolte-Schwarzenegger facial structure, the non-Barrymore-esque profile. He’s friendly and amiable and smiling in interviews (naturally), but he’s another Australian workout ape from Gold’s Gym. And poor Natalie Portman, pretending to be flirtatious and turned on by the whole comic-book superhero perversion. (“It might be tedious but I’ve been well paid!”) And Anthony Hopkins, the absolute whore of whores playing another bearded father of another powerful but tortured legend in the wake of Beowulf and The Wolfman.
And finally, look at the trailer. Listen to the soundtrack when Thor/Hemsworth arches his back and hows at the unfairness of things by going “Aaahrrrrgh!” Hell is not other people — hell is movies like this with the same old ingredients, time and time again. This is why I fantasized about strafing the Comic-Con faithful, because they support films like this and clamor for more.
Paramount will release Thor in 3D on 5.11.11.