comment #1

Matthew Starr says ...

You found Sin City to be offensive?

comment #2

petunio says ...

I feel you Jeff, I feel you. Sometimes movies are bad, but then you think "well... there must be an audience for this piece of shit that I just can't afford to offend..."

Is Rodriguez a good director?... no, hes not. Although give him a camera, some matches, about 2 hours and he will make you a movie. He's THAT resourceful.

comment #3

Jeffrey Wells says ...

I found Sin City's efforts to deliver a sensuous silver nitrate monochrome experience pretty wonderful at first, but the cliche-laded stories and characters were straight out of the hard-boiled noir manual, and the boredom became too much after a while.

comment #4

Wiggumx says ...

So, LexG is going to love it.

comment #5

Jonathan Spuij says ...

Better or not than Piranha? I've been trying to get this answer from you for days Jeff!

comment #6

TL says ...

"You're not a serious director unless you can see, feel or otherwise sense the presence of invisible things."

Something about this comment reminded me of this story about Charles Bronson and Ingmar Bergman:

http://www.ruthlessreviews.com/1956/charles-bronson-r-i-p-2/

I've not no real love for Rodriguez, although I love Dusk Til Dawn and dug Sin City. But, I'll give him this: the man knows how to make his actresses look incredible.

comment #7

LexG says ...

What's with this low-rent, overly magnanimous thing where Rodriguez is always having "CO-DIRECTORS"? What kind of bullshit is that from a name director? Who is Ethan Maniquis? This move always seems so bogus like when Danny Boyle gave some no-name a credit on Slumdog, then mysteriously that person got wholly forgotten when the movie blew up... See also that CO-DIRECTOR of "City of God" who probably didn't even do anything, and meanwhile Mereilles has a big awesome career.

You ever see Clint Eastwood, Michael Mann or Ridley Scott having some CO-DIRECTOR. Like, RR, you're the main dude, just give the nobody a "Special Thanks" credit at the very end and call it a day. Fuck sharing.

comment #8

Gabe@ThePlaylist says ...

The movie is "co-directed" because Rodriguez probably shot most of his stuff years ago. Almost all the footage from the Machete trailer is inserted into the film, and Rodriguez has gone on record saying he shot way more than was needed for the fake preview.

That being said...

TREJO POWER.

Danny Trejo is the FUCKING MAN in this. He seduces Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Lindsay Lohan and her hot redhead mom in this. He is and will forever be a GOLDEN GOD because of this film. He doesn't TAKE SHIT, and he GIVES IT to this never hotter cast.

Michelle Rodriguez, all washboard abs and sneer, is as hot as I've ever seen her, and I had a serious time trying to catch my breath when she's onscreen. A scene where she and Alba grill each other for info is SO HOT that I thought the NEXT THEATER showing MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY MAKES FANCYPANTS EYES AT WET NOODLE TV ACTRESS would CATCH FIRE.

This movie wastes NO TIME being AWESOME. Trejo kills like fifty guys and FUCKS EVERYTHING. Jessica Alba doesn't show her goodies, but she gets damned close, and wears a bunch of sweaty tees and for the life of me, I finally was shown the light. I would now watch her read TEXTBOOK DESCRIPTIONS OF PHONE BOOKS if she chose to do that for the rest of her life. ALBA POWER.

Fuck, I just blacked out, what happened?

comment #9

Rich S. says ...

Holy crap, Gabe, that may have been the best LexG possession rant I've ever seen. Kudos.

comment #10

Jean says ...

Maybe "Gabe" is just Lex's alter log on name that he was planning to use in case he did in fact get banned. But yeah, nice post Gabe!

comment #11

LexG says ...

Funny stuff, but come on-- No mention of feet? Plus I'd NEVER say ANYONE'S Mom was hot. But otherwise, I laughed...

comment #12

LexG says ...

...and actually the amount of capitalization is exactly perfect to make it look like the real deal from once-over, so, props.

comment #13

THE MovieBob says ...

I've come to think that the main difference between Rodriguez and Tarantino is that QT loves movies and makes them mainly because he wants to SEE the ones he thinks up, while RR loves movieMAKING - I get the sense he gets FAR more satisfaction out of shooting and editing and rigging FX and just being "on set" than he ever will out of the finished product... which is probably why so much of his output can be summarized as "GREAT pieces, okay whole."

But in this case, I think there actually is real depth credit due him: Machete is a joke on the surface, but it's driven by a current of righteous anger that feels as genuine and potent as Sweet Sweetback must have in it's day. People will show up basically expecting Latino Expendables and instead they're getting the most politically-incendiary actioner since... I don't even remember. Rodriguez is being coy about it in the press, but he's essentially lobbed a molotov cocktail into the immigration debate; that takes some stones.

comment #14

LexG says ...

"...but he's essentially lobbed a molotov cocktail into the immigration debate; that takes some stones."

Yeah, but what about people who live in places like Pittsburgh and Binghampton and Canton and Columbus and Erie and Rochester and Knoxville, where NO ONE cares about the immigration debate?

comment #15

crazynine says ...

Yeah, but what about people who live in places like Pittsburgh and Binghampton and Canton and Columbus and Erie and Rochester and Knoxville, where NO ONE cares about the immigration debate?

Lex, don't go Wells on us-- that's exactly where *everyone* cares about the immigration debate.

I don't know where the quaint belief popped up that illegal immigrants cross the border and stay there. When you've got small towns in Iowa wrestling with how to teach classes in Spanish, you've got people caring about the debate.

Alas, there *isn't* a debate, as much as it were. Anyone who writes the sentence, "It also pushes a pro-Latino, pro-immigration, screw-the-racist-Arizona-haters political theme that is very much to my liking" hasn't got anything at all to add to a "debate."

Anyway... the more accurate way to phrase your point Lex is to say no one in those towns will care about *this movie*.

comment #16

brad says ...

Rodriguez works in my hometown, and people think he is great, I have not seen a single of his films that are better than crap.

comment #17

The Thing says ...

I don't get it; why does every movie have to make me think and feel? Why can't I just go to a theater and have fun?

Don't get me wrong, I love to see a well written and well directed film centered around a good theme. But I also love seeing naked chicks blow stuff up while dismembering some guy. Not every film has to be a 2001 or a Persona; I'd be incredibly bored if that happened. Sometimes a Piranha 3D or a Machete needs to be mixed in.

comment #18

THE MovieBob says ...

@The Thing,

Why does it have to be either/or? The "just for fun" movies people remember ARE "about" something on some level. People remember "Rambo: First Blood Part II" moreso than "Cobra" because for all it's silliness, "Rambo" actually WAS "about" the disrespect of veterans in general and the unhealed wounds of 'Nam in particular. And "Machete" kicks the shit out of "The Expendables" not because the action is better (though it is) but because there's real, tangible, sincere anger underneath it.

Alba's "Braveheart Speech" moment (it's in the trailers) is as self-consciously wink-wink dopey as these things get... but the movie MEANS IT. That makes all the difference.

@Lex,

FWIW, Lohan is better looking in a "grown woman" way in this than I think she's ever looked. She's still a pretty "aged"-looking 20something, but it plays out as just the ultimate "I'll regret this tomorrow" world-weary try-anything-twice hot.

comment #19

LexG says ...

Lohan is pure sex.

comment #20

hooka man says ...

The good news for fans: there isn't all that much downtime between the relentless action, which, after all, is what that fake Machete trailer promised, and what the audience has come for.

comment #21

Movie Watcher says ...

Alba + Rodriguez = Sex.
Trejo + guns = A high body count and no fucking around. Cheech Marin as a priest?!

On the flip side I want to see The American. What would it be if Clooney was in Machete?

comment #22

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comment #23

The Thing says ...

@THE MovieBob

Yes, a good action movie just doesn't have to be 90 minutes of explosions; there could (and should) be an underlying theme. But what Jeffrey is suggesting (well, saying) is that you can't be a great director unless you make some philosophical, introspective drama about the human condition. With lines like "You're not a serious director unless you can see, feel or otherwise sense the presence of invisible things", it makes it seem like movies like District 9 didn't deserve to be at the Oscars at all, let alone get nominated for Best Picture. The film's metaphor is 20 years too late, and it's essentially Blood Diamond with aliens (but I still love it). I don't remember sensing "the presence of invisible things" at any point during the movie, except for the emotional attachment to the main characters (which was significantly lessened when I re-watched it at home).

I can't comment on Machete, as I haven't seen it, but I'm sure that I'll have similar feelings when I watch it as I did during an action flick like District 9.

And speaking of directing niche films that don't usually see awards, it would a travesty if Edgar Wright didn't get a nomination for Scott Pilgrim.

comment #24

LexG says ...

"it would be a travesty if Edgar Wright didn't get a nomination for Scott Pilgrim."

No. It would be a travesty if he DID. Fortunately he won't. Come on, in addition to being a migraine-inducing, shrill, unfunny mess, that movie looks like it was shot in the cheapest, dankest back alleys of all time. That prolonged stretch with Brandon Routh looks lower rent than 3am Movie Channel porn with Monique Alexander.

So, no.

comment #25

CitizenKanedForPostingThoughts says ...

Not that it's necessarily something to be proud of, but I'd like to think I've done much, much better Lex impressions than the cursory one given by Gabe above.

The thing that throws it all off a bit from the start, at least for me, is the fact that he just doesn't get all that into that winky, genre send-up thing that Rodriguez is so wont to do. If I'm not mistaken, I think he'd sooner watch movies like Torque 2, a Death Wish remake, or even a Death Race 1,000 prequel -- all of which would presumably play the material "straight" -- as opposed to the average Rodriguez flick that tends to have a little bit of that ironic, "yeah, it's shoddy but we MADE it that way" self-aware distance.

Then again, he did enjoy Piranha 3-D (which I saw yesterday...how is this truly and utterly awful movie getting a pass???), so who the hell knows. There's never really any accounting for taste.

comment #26

CitizenKanedForPostingThoughts says ...

Machete is a joke on the surface, but it's driven by a "current of righteous anger that feels as genuine and potent as Sweet Sweetback must have in it's day."

I'm not going to say you don't have a point, or aren't drawing a somewhat legitimate parallel, but Jesus -- let's not get carried away here.

comment #27

CitizenKanedForPostingThoughts says ...

"Lex, don't go Wells on us-- that's exactly where *everyone* cares about the immigration debate."

Beg to differ. At least in Columbus, the people who care about the immigration debate are in the vast minority (see what I did there?).

And a lot of people really want to see Machete here, too (I think it could be a genuine Labor Day flyover B.O. surprise -- I think a high-teens opening weekend is achievable) so you're kinda 0/2 on that post, at least from where I'm sitting.

comment #28

LexG says ...

There's a TORQUE 2??????????

YES!

comment #29

CitizenKanedForPostingThoughts says ...

"And speaking of directing niche films that don't usually see awards, it would a travesty if Edgar Wright didn't get a nomination for Scott Pilgrim."

I'm not going to get into it too heavily here, but even if I agreed with your admiration for that picture and found it to be a picture that really pushed the technical and conceptual idea of what a movie can be, the fact of the matter is that "deserve" actually has nothing to do with winning an Oscar.

How many times has what you considered to be the actual best directing of any given year actually won someone a Best Director Award? I can probably count the number of times in my lifetime on one hand. How about great directing achievements that aren't even nominated, and are considerably more interesting than one -- if not four -- of the nominees?

This happens almost every year. What about Fincher in '99? Unforgivable. And the nominees that year weren't even that bad, at least compared to their usual standards (most years it seems like they nominate "Lasse Hallstrom" four times, instead of just once).

comment #30

THE MovieBob says ...

I'll need to see the rest of the year's big director-movies before saying whether Wright should get a nod, but I'll DEFINITELY go all-in that "Pilgrim" should get a score, sound-design and editing nod. Editing especially, but it won't because that's where it's boldest (see also: Ang Lee's "Hulk.")

comment #31

The Thing says ...

@Lex

First off, you probably aren't the target audience, because as an 18-year-old video game nerd, there wasn't more than 5 minutes between laughs for me. And yes, the Routh fight was a bit low-budget, but I was too busy laughing at the vegan jokes to care (which should be the way a comedy should be - writing over style, a la Clerks). And the movie itself is about a member of struggling indy band member; not exactly going to be playing Yankee stadium and living in penthouses. Wright showed the real Toronto that the average person would see; sorry it wasn't shiny and new and pretty. Of course, when you compare it to what you saw in The Departed and No Country for Old Men, it's understandable to say that the locales were dirty and dank. Besides, you could tell the budget was spent on the effects, not locations, which is vital in a movie like this.

As for the directing, one scene sticks out to me - after Scott dreams of Romona and falls in love with her. The following scenes of being "lost in love" are the most original and inventive I've ever seen. Hell, he even got Michael Cera to do something other than "quirky, awkward nerd", even if it was "douchebaggy, quirky, awkward nerd". That's got to count for something.

comment #32

Absinth Quell Pro says ...

Can I ask one question of any fan of Scott Pilgrim:

Were you high when you saw it?

Answer honestly now.

comment #33

Noah Cross says ...

Arizonians are certainly racist to be concerned about the drug running, kidnapping and murders committed by those coming illegally over their border.

comment #34

Kakihara says ...

Ok, I dug it, but it could've been tighter and less talky. And less reliant on quick cuts. Alba should be required to work with RR for the rest of her 15 minutes, 'cus he's the only director who's able to conceal her one-note acting. Lohan comes off like she's still on her "meds", though. And the whole conspiracy angle falls flat, and should've been kept simple. DeNiro and Johnson's scenes are wasted, and Seagal stole the show. But compared to Kick-Ass, Machete's five star material.

Absinth: Well, people were certainly high when they praised 'Wild Things.

Noah: Racist enough to lie about this stuff, anyway.