“Gigantic Action We’ve Never Seen Before”
Straight from Moscow, Drew McWeeny‘s Transformers 3 review posted this morning on Hitfix, and he’s calling it “easily the best film in the series” and “an overwhelming sensory experience [with] a solid hour-long action sequence in Chicago that uses everything Bay’s ever done before.”
Transformers 3 is basically the latest pass at the kind of “personal story on an apocalyptic scale that Bay loves to try to tell, and that other guys like Roland Emmerich and James Cameron and even Steven Spielberg love to do,” McWeeny writes. “And this is the best version of it that Bay’s made so far.
“For the first time since Avatar, I am going to recommend that you find the biggest and best 3D theater you can find and buy yourself a ticket, because Transformers: Dark Of The Moon, especially seen in IMAX 3D, is [the shit]. The sound mix alone is more exciting than anything in the billion-dollar-bore of Pirates 4. This is gigantic action we’ve never seen before, and Bay’s reaction to shooting and cutting his film for 3D is to get better at what he does. It raised his game, and as a result, I feel like we just saw a dare thrown down by one of Hollywood’s biggest action specialists: ‘Top this.’
“The Chicago action finale is an astonishing mix of physical staging, live-action stunt work, location shooting, and visual effects, and there comes a point where I’m really not sure what was built, what was real, what’s totally fake…and it doesn’t matter. What matters is that the stakes in the film are crystal clear, the purpose of the characters is laid out carefully, and the sequence just keeps building and building until finally it comes down to three characters and a bridge.
“And since it’s a Transformers movie, I’m pleased to see that the three characters who are involved in that ending are the right three. The focus in this film finally feels like it’s on the right things and the right moments. If the Chicago sequence was the only great set piece in the film, I’d still say it’s worth seeing, but the movie actually features impressive sequences all the way through, including an early encounter with Shockwave in Chernobyl and a really creepy scene where a bird-like Decepticon hunts down and murders all the humans who have helped the Decepticons over the years.
“And through it all, it feels to me like Bay is trying new things, both in the shooting and the cutting. It’s not a radical re-invention…it’s still recognizably Michael Bay. But the small differences in the rhythms of his shooting and his cutting make a big difference in the overall impact.”
He may be right. I don’t know. What I do know is that I will wait for the reviews to cone in from people who were not treated to an all expenses trip to Moscow by the studio releasing the film in question.
“What matters is that the stakes in the film are crystal clear, the purpose of the characters is laid out carefully, and the sequence just keeps building and building until finally it comes down to three characters and a bridge.”
This is still a film franchise about a bunch of cars that change into robots, right? The one based on an 80s cartoon and toy line? Just checking.
JLC…. you totally rule.
Cars? I thought these things were giant robots. Are the cars giant too?
The second movie was so awful, it is going to take a couple dozen raves to get me to the theater for this one. I am still trying to purge Green Lantern from my system so maybe I’ll go out of desperation.
I had to sit through a 30 second commerical for Ben and Jerry’s before I got to a 33 second stand -up piece from McWeeny in Red Square?
This is no surprise as the mightily impressive trailers are fucking enormous in scope and look to feature some of the best blending of live-action footage and CGI work ever attempted. Leave it to Bay (and Fincher to be sure) to consistently set the bar in this respect.
Jeff — when do you see the film? Tonight?
I have to laugh whenever you give this film attention, making it sound like the rest of the world, cinephiles included, care about this, yet nobody gives a damn about superior entertainment like Potter.
Potter is the dullest thing in the world. I tried to watch a couple of them, and couldn’t do it. The grey, dark atmosphere is energy draining, and it’s stark contrast to the way Burton uses it and makes his films feel alive in it.
You mean like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Planet of the Apes? Alice in Wonderland? Corpse Bride?
Potter will likely go down as one of the most consistently high quality family series of all time, and one of the few to almost never dumb down the material for younger audiences.
People rate Potter highly because the films are almost entirely about the characters. Hell, this last one is the only one that is going to be nearly all-out action assault, but after 7 films of character development, it has earned the right to go all out in its last go. It should be very fun.
What I can guarantee is, though, that despite Transformers clearly being for an older audience (more violent action, sexuality, and whatnot), it is also going to be an infinitely dumber and pointless movie.
Biff: Did you just diss Corpse Bride? It’s only got an 84% positive on RT…what are you saying, exactly?
Compared to Nightmare Before Christmas, Corpse Bride is just a bore. Hell, compared to Fantastic Mr. Fox, Corpse Bride is a bore.
For the sake of argument, though, it doesn’t change that Burton’s films in the past 7-8 years have, more often than not, been duds.
“an overwhelming sensory experience [with] a solid hour-long action sequence in Chicago that uses everything Bay’s ever done before.”
Ah, cool. Pencil me in as a “skip” on this one, then. As a matter of fact, fuck that pencil shit — you can go ahead and use pen.
Even in Burton’s bad films, I’m never bored by the color palette. HP films are so dreary and melancholic that’s not worth it to watch. The characters themselves aren’t interesting either. Little personality, no charisma, they’re just there.
Yeah those Harry Potter films are dull and awful. I made it through about half of the last one before i completely tuned out. The trailer for the new one makes it look so overwhelmingly tiring, it’s absurd that a grown man would enjoy this. And it’s telling how these Potter movies seem to attract the worst critics, like deplorable, obese man-babies such as Devin Faraci and his ilk.
I have no trouble believing that after spending close to $800-$900 Million making this same movie twice before that Bay has finally achieved something approaching competence with this one.
In the end a 2-star movie with ONE good action scene for the last hour WOULD easily make it the best of the series – too bad it still has that same terrible story (at this point there’s no salvaging the mythos of this series) misused cast hideously-overdesigned CGI robots.
Over/under on # of people mistaking Drew for an actual Russian? I’ll be opening the bidding at -2.
Very disappointed in Drew as a journalist. He’s generally a smart guy.
People who write serious film criticism should never ever accept any perks from studios… swag, set visits or trips to a world premiere. It’s a blatant conflict of interest.
At the very least a writer should not allow studios to dictate their ethical standards… like when they can or can’t release a review. This whole “embargo” bullshit would not exist if critics just followed common sense and waited for the release date to publish.
The studios have almost completely turned movie journalism ethics into marketing and PR now.
What do you expect? I’m convinced that is how Ain’t It Cool News turns a profit and stays operational.
Just for the (opinionated) record, Tim Burton hasn’t made a truly great film since “Ed Wood”. He’s spent the past decade stripping his films of their entire production design with an over reliance on shitty CGI, bad scripts, and even worse acting. He’s lost all concept of what it means to have a ‘seamless’ image. As a result the images are often oddly flat and hollow despite their depth of color. When I finally got around to “Alice in Wonderland” on Netflix, I was STUNNED that it became the box office phenom that it was.
I’ll say one thing. At least Bay, DreamWorks and Paramount had the balls to double down on this movie after the last movie proved so terrible. They could have gone the route of Disney, which released Pirates 4 with its budget slashed in half, resulting in a Cinemascope chamber piece with three action sequences interspersed amid shots of people walking.
Bay said, “Fuck that, DOUBLE the budget and I’ll make your heads explode.” And people listened.
Yeah, sorry, guys, that this isn’t gonna be two hours Juliette Binoche making stupid faces with smoke billowing out of her face as she fails to provide for her child because her stupid fucking Chinese marionette show doesn’t pay enough for him to keep his red balloon.
Anyone who isn’t stoked for this movie is a total asshole.
This is what movies are all about.
” … the sequence just keeps building and building until finally it comes down to three characters and a bridge.”
Just as long as two of those characters aren’t Sam’s stupid fucking parents overdosing on pot brownies.
I dunno … Given that it’s a Bay film, I’m sure it delivers technical thrills and sensory overload. However, Bay seriously screwed up the first two movies about giant robots fighting each other. How many chances should he get to finally do it right??
Anyone who isn’t stoked for this movie is a total asshole.
Well I’m an asshole fuck me.
Barnes: You didn’t like Sweeney Todd?
Well, then you should try being a little more enthusiastic and less cynical, and LOOKING FORWARD to things that UNDENIABLY look AWESOME.
Like this movie. Which is like GOD COMING DOWN FROM HEAVEN, and I don’t even believe in God. I plan on shaking, crying, and basically jizzing for 160 minutes watching this, because it’s WHAT MOVIES SHOULD BE:
Hot chicks, BRIGHT COLORS not desaturated murk, black guys lit in that BAY WAY where they look extra black and badass, SUNGLASSES, SWAMI MUSIC, SUNSETS, EXPLOSIONS, GREASED LEGS IN HIGH HEELS, Turturro mugging, GOOD LOOKING PEOPLE BEING WINNERS, Josh Duhamel’s hair, more explosions, FAST CARS, bully humor, frat humor, MAKING FUN OF ETHNIC PEOPLE AND NERDS, more explosions, tits, greased legs again, THINGS THAT LOOK LIKE TOP GUN, aviation, SKIES, URBAN SKYSCAPES, loud music, HEAVY METAL, more black guys, models, BEING OUT LATE AT NIGHT, and best of all, not being shot in some STUPID fucking murky caves or woods like every other cheap-jack movie, but instead TAKING PLACE IN BIG CITIES with SKYSCRAPERS which are EXCITING.
Total Film in the Uk gave it three starts. Spectacular last hour but awful film hour and a half. Loads of lame comedy again and the Whitely bird is truly dreadful apparently.
I just realized: LexG is actually Joe Bob Briggs.
Rashad, I wanted to like “Sweeney”. Hell, I wanted to LOVE it and fall head over heels for it, but….earlier criticisms apply. The over reliance on shitty CGI effects and shitty CGI production designed killed it for me.
Remember the days when Burton would actually build shit, aka “Sleepy Hollow”? That film is helped, significantly, by it’s actual set location and production design. It adds to the sense of foreboding terror. Hell, Burton could have ripped off the production design of “From Hell” and “Sweeney” would have been more affecting. I knew I was set for disappointment at the start of the opening credits with the CGI river of blood.
I don’t know what you’re referring to honestly. The sets and production were what drew me into the story in the first place. Maybe some backgrounds had CG and stuff, but to me there wasn’t anything noticeable. It made things look more like a painting
Rashad, now I’m confused. You have no idea what I’m talking about yet you just admitted that the production design looked like a painting. If the majority of a film’s production design looks like a painting then….well, it’s likely not production design that’s all that great. Why was/is LOTR such an achievement? Because, at no point, could you really tell the effects. The worlds of CGI, models, camera tricks, and matte paintings were so profoundly seamless that an actual, new world was created. Burton’s films over the last decade have struggled mightily to create new worlds. Unfortunately, because it does look like a painting, the effort fails.
“Hot chicks, BRIGHT COLORS not desaturated murk, black guys lit in that BAY WAY where they look extra black and badass, SUNGLASSES, SWAMI MUSIC, SUNSETS, EXPLOSIONS, GREASED LEGS IN HIGH HEELS, Turturro mugging, GOOD LOOKING PEOPLE BEING WINNERS, Josh Duhamel’s hair, more explosions, FAST CARS, bully humor, frat humor, MAKING FUN OF ETHNIC PEOPLE AND NERDS, more explosions, tits, greased legs again, THINGS THAT LOOK LIKE TOP GUN, aviation, SKIES, URBAN SKYSCAPES, loud music, HEAVY METAL, more black guys, models, BEING OUT LATE AT NIGHT, and best of all, not being shot in some STUPID fucking murky caves or woods like every other cheap-jack movie, but instead TAKING PLACE IN BIG CITIES with SKYSCRAPERS which are EXCITING.”
MAJOR LEX POWER
Barnes: Matte paintings are digital now, and that’s what WETA created for LOTR. In Sweeney, I hardly noticed the effects work. Take for instance the beach scene – gorgeous to look at the and the song is great. I was confused by your complaint because most of the movies takes place on actual sets and stages, so it’s weird to be nitpicking background buildings hardly in the shot or so. It’s hardly a negative to say something looks like a painting.
I’m not exactly a fan of Bay but these are the movies he should be doing. I loved the first two (cornball humor and all–why shouldn’t it be cornball?) and can’t wait to see this one.
Rashad, WETA does a better job at it than anything Burton’s done in the last decade. We’ll have to agree to disagree. And not all of LOTR’s matte paintings were digital. Trust me, I’m the dork that spend untold hours watching all the bonus footage on the box sets.
Every time Burton would pull out of a some level of a close up to a big overview of the city….it killed the mood for me. I could see the lines of CGI and that was distracting. You’re right about the beach scene. It was the best sequence and my favorite part of the whole film. But, in this case, I can’t give the whole film a pass just because of one sequence.
Gotta back up Barnes, Burton’s signature quirky miniatures and use of trick photography lost out to a much blander CGI approximation in later films like Sweeney. That being said, maybe DARK SHADOWS will see him find the balance.
As for Bay, he believes in nothing but the bottom line.
The Iron Giant
The Incredibles
Ratatouille
I think Brad Bird has earned the benefit of doubt that his first live action feature won’t suck.
So, basically, it’s the tastiest turd in the toilet.
I would love to see this in IMAX 3D…but I couldn’t even finish watching the last one, so I can’t possibly imagine spending $20 a ticket on this shiny turd. Plus, I’m sure it will look and sound better in my home on Blu-Ray when I hit Redbox and overpay an entire $1.50 for it 6 months from now.
“Plus, I’m sure it will look and sound better in my home on Blu-Ray when I hit Redbox and overpay an entire $1.50 for it 6 months from now.”
BULLSHIT. I’m sick of hearing about everyone jizzing off to their stupid fucking “home theater.” That can NEVER NEVER NEVER beat a theater screen, it can never replicate the experience, especially knowing you flippant dicks, you’d be all sitting around PAUSING IT every five seconds and checking your email and using the bathroom, instead of being HELD CAPTIVE. Plus doesn’t it ANNOY YOUR NEIGHBORS with you all jacking the volume up to THX levels? Have some respect. Fucking SICK of everyone bragging on their STUPID home theater, which I can GUARANTEE sucks ass.
Anyone who RENTS MOVIES instead of SEEING THEM IN THEATERS should be executed. They should be shot.
BAY POWER. He is your GOD, he does the things YOU wish you could DO, but instead you can’t. At least I admit it… He is the MASTER FILMMAKER of ALL TIME, and everyone else sucks next to BAY. Keep on watching your movies about stupid Persian kids trying to reclaim their lost ballet shoes.
WEDNESDAY is for GODS.
BAY.
LexG needs to get laid more. Or at least once.
Fuck off, Mr Palmer
Can you imagine finding some hotshot upstart director with Bay’s technical ability with an IQ over 90?
How much money does Bay make?
Shut up and BOW.
The dynamic range of Lex’s posts here, with the caps and the unbridled insanity, is impressive, like a good Nirvana song with pure id where the angst used to be.
Hey, it was half a compliment.
I’m curious to see what an anamorphic film shot in true 3D looks like (trying to forget conversion-abortions like CLASH OF THE TITANS). Have there been that many?
“Holy Cow, that Decepticon just took out Wayne Tower! YOU BASTARDS!”
Chicago makes everything look cooler (see ‘The Negotiator’, ‘Fugitive’, ‘Ferris’, etc.), but we’re just 2 years removed from some pretty iconic imagery from the Nolan gang. I still think Bay would have been better off if his gang of robots had eaten a different city.
Nolan is a fan of Bay’s. He’s gonna show Chris how to blow up a city right.
“Fucking SICK of everyone bragging on their STUPID home theater, which I can GUARANTEE sucks ass.”
Nope. Actually it doesn’t. It’s awesome. It has bowel loosening bass and a crisp 1080P image at 133″ diagonal. And I can have coke and whores in the room with me while I watch it. HOME THEATER FTW every damn time, bro.
Lex, I respectfully disagree with your opinion about Bay’s films, but I love your enthusiasm.
“Why was/is LOTR such an achievement? Because, at no point, could you really tell the effects.”
Barnes78: who are you really, Peter Jackson?
I’m sorry, but even the best visual effects are noticeable as such. There’s always something. Whether they’re done in camera, done practically in post, done with CGI… there’s something.
And Lex: if you were a TRUE Bay fan… you’d be going to a screening Tuesday night to get your Bayhem on 24 hours earlier. BOW to the Tuesday night screenings.
I wish I could enjoy Bay films the way Lex does. I don’t like being a hater, but I couldn’t stomach Transformers 2. I like Armageddon, Bad Boys II (thinking about it, I never saw the first Bad Boys), and The Island, though. I wish Bay weren’t making action figure movies.
want to see ZOOKEEPER bad because it has talking animals, one of my fave genres …. however the premise is weak …. hot babes don’t go out with fat funny guys ….. that being said if Kevin James is a zoo keeper he probably has a doctorate in some science and thus would be a chick magnet based on that … the thought that a more glamorous job is going to help him win the affections of a woman with no brains is just – the kind of plot where talking animals are necessary to make the film believable ….. that’s right, my first question to Buck B was what did he think of Mr Ed
Mr. F., I’ll take your point as mildly valid but, at the same time, the achievement I speak of is obvious and well deserved (even if the films were a little long in the tooth).
Here’s hoping the 3D makes Mr.Bay clamp down on his editors ADHD style a bit, so that the movie is frigging coherent. (Please don’t clamp down on the sound guys, though. One thing you can be sure of in a Michael Bay movie… the sound guys earned their paycheck!)
Weird thing about Michael Bay… his movies are all basically the same, yet he’s totally hit and miss.
BAD BOYS…bad
THE ROCK… good
ARMAGEDDON…good
PEARLHARBOR…hit and miss several times within its own 3-hr running time
THE ISLAND…nifty sci-fi movie until it turned into a lame Michael Bay movie
BAD BOYS 2…bad
TRANSFORMERS…good
TRANSFORMERS 2…even he admits it’s terrible!
so, it looks like he’s at the right point in his pendulum to make something good again. Guess we;ll find out on Tuesday.
And 3D kicks ass for something like this.
BOW TO THE TOY MOVIE.
RIGHT AWAY, YOU ASSHOLES.
GET ON YOUR KNEES, WITH ME.
QUICK!
BAD BOYS 2 is so far over the top that it left ridiculously bad and went to being good…I really don’t see how anyone can hate that movie. It’s too stupid to hate.
“At the very least a writer should not allow studios to dictate their ethical standards… like when they can or can’t release a review.”
You’re encouraging film reviewers to be *less* ethical by signing agreements and then not honoring them? Or are you saying they should be ethical by not signing them and, thus, not seeing the movies?
This review is promising. The past 2 movies have been about my most hated actor making stuttery, bad, “ironically awkward” jokes and the military being awesome. Very little robot fighting for a movie that’s supposed to be ALL robot fighting. However, if McWeeny’s right, it damn well better come down to Optimus Prime, Bubblebee, and a third Transformer.
“Well, then you should try being a little more enthusiastic and less cynical,”
Oddly, this post fills me with the immediate urge to jerk off to K-Stew’s feet. And you know what? I may just do it. LEX G POWER.
Wait, Lex — so it’s okay to have Turturro mugging but not Binoche? Well, at least it could be worse, eh? Could be some screeching Chinese broad, amIright? Now who’s the asshole!
Also, I defy you to name one actual “heavy metal” song Michael Bay uses in his films. I mean, I could be wrong because I’ve actually sworn off watching them since Bad Boys 2 — which is on my shortlist of the most offensively bad summer movies I have ever seen — but these Linkin Park power-pop ballads are nowhere to be found in my Decibal magazine.
Linkin Park — the Nelson of the ’00s. Actually I’m not even sure they’re that good (“After the Rain” POWER).
BAY.
BobbyLupo, critics who publish reviews on the release date (your Eberts & Maltins) wouldn’t be required by a studio to sign any agreement. That would be pointless.
Equally pointless: Publishing a review on a date no reader/ viewer can possibly see the film.
And don’t give me that Omar on The Wire “That’s just the game, baby” crap.
“BobbyLupo, critics who publish reviews on the release date (your Eberts & Maltins) wouldn’t be required by a studio to sign any agreement. That would be pointless.”
Your point is that as long as everybody already agrees to do something, there’s no need for them to officially legally agree to it? That doesn’t make much sense, because how can you be sure that everybody agrees to do it if they aren’t willing to legally sign an agreement?
“Equally pointless: Publishing a review on a date no reader/ viewer can possibly see the film.”
I tend to agree with you on this, but I also see the flipside, which is that movie reviewers desperately want to believe that they’re part of some larger cultural thing. They don’t want to be limited in the same way their readers are, they want to be able to shape what their readers are looking foward to, and hope to have some sort of impact on the cultural landscape.
Suppose, for the sake of argument, that a critic sees a movie at a film festival. The movie doesn’t have a distributor yet. By your logic, there is no value or merit in writing up this film, because as far as the reviewer knows, nobody will ever see it. But if enough reviewers think it’s worthy and review it, and it starts to get a little buzz going, the movie may actually *get* released. So it’s not quite as black-and-white as you make it.
Now, obviously, that’s not the case with a movie like TF3. With a movie like TF3, I believe the critics see themselves as standing between the audience and $100 million worth of marketing designed to make you think it’s going to be a good movie. In which case, you have to get your feet planted before the money has been spent, or you’re just pissing into the wind.
I haven’t seen Potter past the first one, but the recent posters for the new one look a lot shittier than the older ones.
Barnes: I liked Sweeney Todd more than Sleepy Hollow, but yeah, Timmeh’s been pretty barren in terms of exciting projects since Ed Wood.
Lex: “black guys lit in that BAY WAY where they look extra black and badass,”
Yeah, totally straight.
I will agree with you on his location scouting, though.
johnny: “THE ISLAND…nifty sci-fi movie until it turned into a lame Michael Bay movie”
That’s ‘cus it was plagiarized.
Biff: You’re not alone – I’m wild about Harry. Loved the books, too. Listened to Books on Tape back and forth to work.
So many quality people and performances – but it’s the s.t.o.r.y.
See, I like concepts about The Chosen One.
and plenty of grown up men/women are fans – not absurd at all.
Transformers? Now THAT’S absurd. and too bad about The Island. They gave the story away.
The first movie is still the best. Simple, unconvoluted… introduced all the characters well in a way that could be understood/appreciated by those who weren’t fans of the characters (like me). The sequel and this one are a mess clearly directed by a someone whose head is stuffed so far up his own butt that he ignores simple storytelling faux pas. For all Bay’s claims that the problems with the last movie were due to the writer’s strike, this one has many of the SAME problems only this one tries to gloss over them with an hour-long FX spectacle in hopes people will forget all of the bad acting/writing earlier… I guess it worked for some people. This literally had the same problems as Battle: Los Angeles but it also gave me a headache and made me feel nauseous, not an experience I can walk out of recommending to anyone.
EDouglas: The first one still blows. But I guess by the low standards of it being a live-action cartoon, it delivered for enough people.
You fly someone to Moscow for a film premiere and you get yourself a glowing rave! Funny how that works.
I don’t really care one bit what McWeeny thinks of the film as his credibility as a non-biased reviewer is nil.
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