Stop The Bleeding

Every so often I have the feeling that money is just pouring out of me. Everything I do and everywhere I turn I’m bleeding 20s, 50s and 100s. Hundreds, thousands. Sooner or later this awful feeling attains critical mass and I have to stomp on the brakes and shut down because I just need the hemorrhaging to stop. Need a tourniquet, getting short of breath.

My 21-inch suitcase is looking a little ragged so I was looking at new ones yesterday in the Swiss Army store in the Beverly Center. I liked a modest one that went for $260-something but with the tax it was just about $300, and something in me said “no! no!” and I thanked the sales guy and left. This morning at LAX I bought a New Yorker and a N.Y. Times and a Tic-Tac and some gum and it cost $15 bucks…what?

I can’t go back to LA so I want to retreat to some podunk town and stay in a rented room and eat apples and take long walks and just not spend anything…Jesus.

  • JLC

    Well, if you stopped buying every movie that comes out on Blu-Ray, at retail, that would probably help. I’m always astonished by how much you spend on media, particularly since I was once that way myself (though I never got that bad).

    And what podunk town could you possibly find relaxing? Fifteen minutes of people watching in any small town in America and you would have a stroke.

  • 62Lincoln

    Move in with Jett for 6 months. Tell him you need a monetary break. This blog should almost write itself!

  • MeekayD

    As someone who is watching his bank account slowly dwindle to zero while waiting for some anticipated deposits to come in, I absolutely hate that feeling.

    You don’t need huge buckets of cash to get through life, but when you have to think about your account balance every time you open your wallet, it’s a definitely a grating experience.

  • MickTravisMcGee

    Oddly enough, I bought five apples this afternoon and it was $6.00.

  • lbeale

    Join me in Raleigh. Good weather, sophisticated people, lots to do. Rents a lot cheaper than NYC or LA.

  • Telemachos

    Jeff and Lex, living together — a sitcom for the 21st century. Make it happen.

  • George Prager

    Smart move on the suitcase. You can probably get a good one for 70 bucks at the Century 21 across from what used to be the World Trade Center.
    http://www.c21stores.com/downtown/

  • Indeed

    Define irony:

    This post created immediately after Jeff harps on the “indulgence” of people who pack more than a carry on for a flight.

  • thevisceral

    I have the same feeling every time I drop a penny.

  • hollywoodtease

    FFS, anyone can get a 4-5 piece luggage set for under $200. If you are looking for *one* great suitcase it should still be under two bills. Who shops retail anyomore, Amazon is cheaper than just about anywhere.

  • Zach

    Ross has cheap luggage. Their stores are cesspools, but the prices make it bearable.

  • Ray

    Austin. Seriously.

    It’s FAR cheaper than LA/NYC, you’re surrounded by Lefties, a movie scene, culture, warm weather for aging bones, women are attractive, and best of all you’re centrally located to fly to LA or NYC whenever work calls for it.

    Plus you could wear your cowboy hat and no one would make fun of you for it.

  • moviesquad

    Ray, I’m pretty sure Jeff hates Austin due to it being almost ground zero of fan/comic book boy culture.

  • ray ban

    Every so often I have the feeling that money is just pouring out of me.Ray Ban Wayfarer

  • George Prager

    Ira Parks says…

    George Prager says…

    LexG says…

    FUCK suitcases. You’re clothes are going to get WRINKLED anyway, so why would you spend $300 BUCKS on something you’re only going to use a couple times a year. GARBAGE BAG: GOOD ENOUGH.

    Q: Why do gay guys always check out of their hotel rooms on time?
    A: They pack up their shit the night before.
    GOOD JOKE

  • lazarus

    Jeff’s a scooter accident away from entering his Big Pink recluse period.

    Five years later blog scholars will pour over the mysteries of “The Basement Posts”.

  • Orotund Vowel

    The Ray ban spam robot in comnment #14 FTW!

  • SavannahPlant224

    As somebody who is watching his checking account slowly dwindle to zero whereas looking ahead to some anticipated deposits to return in, I fully hate that feeling.
    http://www.gogole.us.com
    You don’t want huge buckets of money to urge through life, however after you ought to consider your account balance each time you open your wallet, it is a undoubtedly a grating expertise.

  • Langowski462

    “Every woman should have four pets in her life. A mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass who pays for everything.” gooogle earth

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    There is a serious fiscal problem to all western economy countries. Take Europe for example and especially Greece….it’s over – debt caused prices to dangerously increase and now people are starving.

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