A Conversation

I just want to tell you something that I think you should hear. I know something, and I could tell you how I know but you wouldn’t believe me or you’d think I’m nuts so let’s skip that part. But I know this and I want you to really try and…well, not reject it outright. Just let what I’m going to say hang there, at least. Just let in hang in the air and be still.

Marilyn Monroe shooting skinny-dip scene in Something’s Got To Give in early June 1962.

I’m eccentric, okay, but not any crazier than you or anyone else in your circle, and I’m telling you this because you have a potentially rich and rewarding life ahead of you, and possibly even a beautiful life. Really. You do. I’m telling you this because…because I want you to try and listen because this is a good thing, not a bad thing, what I’m about to say. I’m telling you that unless you change some things you’re going…I’m sorry but you’re going to be dead a little more than two months from now, and it’s completely avoidable. No, I’m serious. I know, I know…but believe me, I know.

Stop taking sedatives, start working out with a personal trainer, stop drinking and start eating more vegetables. And stop with the basket-case behavior. You’re a superb actress, you’re relatively young, and the ’60s as you know them are about to change. In a sense we’re still part of the late ’50s, but huge convulsions are about to happen socially and culturally, and one of them is that in just a few years women are going to start holding each other and organizing and celebrating themselves and telling those paternalistic shits who’ve been suppressing your spirit and treating you like an object and giving you such grief where to go, and really, I swear…you just have to get healthy and tough it out and you’ll be part of a different world and everything will start to change.

And you’ll be amazed. Just hang in there and try and love yourself a bit more, and forget about the Rat Pack and JFK and that whole demimonde. You’re just going through a bad patch.

  • JLC

    Are we pitching a remake of Somewhere in Time?

  • VoiceOfReason

    Never knew her father, and her mother was a metal patient incapable of showing love. She was doomed from the beginning.

  • VoiceOfReason

    Mental patient. Sorry.

  • Cadavra

    Nice piece. If only…

  • DiscoNap

    Also that asshole you’re still crying yourself to sleep over is about to get his head blown off, don’t you want to live to see that?

  • GeorgePrager

    Joe DiMaggio and Arthur Miller were bad guys as well.

  • Glenn Kenny

    I’m just gonna say that the idea of a “metal patient” is FREAKING AWESOME!

  • Rael

    What is up with these lazy, “what if” posts? Hindsight is 20/20 and all.

  • Still Ray

    True story: whenever the wife calls my desk from home the caller ID flashes MY name.

    For a moment I’m convinced that it’s ME calling me, only from the future.

    “Jump under the desk, Ray…… NOW!”

  • Guy Lodge

    Not much of “a conversation,” is it? More of a lecture.

  • Jeffrey Wells

    You can imagine, Guy, what she’d say, what she’d be thinking, how she’d react. You don’t need me for that. Okay, I’ll summarize. She’d be bothered and bewildered by this message for a day or two, and then she’d go right back into her usual dysfunction groove and then turn up dead in early August like nothing ever happened and no chance to avoid this fate was ever put before her.

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  • Gideon

    Nice post… a reminder that life has its ups and downs, and you never really know what’s coming next. “This too shall pass,” whatever “this” is.

    A friendly acquaintance (it would be lying to call him a close personal friend, but I knew him for about ten years – he was close with a good friend of mine – and we got along, liked each other, etc.) hung himself a few days ago, so maybe I’m especially disposed to be moved by this sort of post at the moment, but it definitely affected me.

    Wish somebody had said what Jeff wrote to MM (and to the guy I knew, who was a genuinely kind, intelligent person with some real depth)… maybe, as Jeff suggests, it wouldn’t have changed things, but maybe it would have. Maybe it will change things for somebody reading this thread… I sure hope it does.

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