Looper Security Goon

At 3 pm this afternoon I attended a Sony Studios screening of Rian Johnson‘s Looper (9.28). I can’t discuss this imaginative sci-fi actioner until it plays Toronto next week, but I can at least get into the fact that Sony felt obliged to hire a security guy to stand on the side aisle of the screening room (#23 inside the Jimmy Stewart building) and stare intently at the viewers, most of whom appeared to be veteran editors, journos and columnists.

I understand about security goons keeping an eye on all-media invitees inside large theatres, but inside a small screening room? What are the odds that Hitfix‘s Greg Ellwood or MCN‘s David Poland or TheWrap‘s Steve Pond or Deadline‘s Pete Hammond (who were there this afternoon) are going to pull out a iPhone and start video-recording? You tell me.

When you’re trying to watch a film it’s at least slightly bothersome to have Creasy from Man On Fire standing 15 or 20 feet away and staring a hole in the side of your head. I was half-watching Joseph Gordon Levitt and Bruce Willis go through the blam-blam, time-travel paces and half silently saying to this business-suited goon, “Yo, homie…would you mind sitting down and stop creeping up and down the aisle? Your presence is messing with my concentration.”

19 thoughts on “Looper Security Goon

  1. DuluozGray on said:

    The funniest bit is the conceit that anyone gives enough of a shit about Looper to surreptitiously tape it in order to get it out to the throngs of people just demanding to see this piece of shit early.

  2. Exchange at 3:58 pm Today in Culver City-

    Wells - Hi David how are you – looking forward to the new Rian movie?

    Poland – Shut the fuck up and sit down Wells I’m David Poland and you’re beneath me.

    Then, instead of the throw down called for Wells sat down and turned to Ellwood and said “How about Barcelona!?”

  3. Also: “Creasy in ‘Man on Fire’?” Kinda obvious, no? Make it look like you’re at least trying a LITTLE. Say, “Cooke in ‘Commando’” or “President Lindberg in ‘The Fifth Element.’” Show SOME effort.

  4. “The guy was white with a moustache. He looked like a staunch Republican.”

    He must have been twirling the mustache.

  5. “What are the odds that Hitfix’s Greg Ellwood or MCN’s David Poland or TheWrap’s Steve Pond or Deadline’s Pete Hammond (who were there this afternoon) are going to pull out a iPhone and start video-recording? You tell me.”

    Clearly, they know H-E and your post office iPhone video. They couldn’t take the chance.

    “I was talking about the vibe. The guy was white with a moustache. He looked like a staunch Republican.”

    I had the same reaction as Kenny, but also because of the “Yo, homie…”

  6. Doesn’t Poland ALWAYS see shit like six times, for NO reason?

    I remember some throwaway in his early review of ROCKY BALBOA, hilariously like two weeks before it came out, and he’s all, “I’ve seen ROCKY BALBOA three times now, and I’ve come to the conclusion it kinda sucks.” I think he just goes and goes as an ego thing.

    Though one time he got me into a BLACK SWAN screening. I begged and begged, and he’s all CAN YOU BE IN HOLLYWOOD IN TWO HOURS, YOU’RE ON THE LIST. So I get down there, stroll in like a nervous motherfucker because I KNOW this shit ain’t gonna work out, and I’m all “Hey I’m on the list,” and the guy’s like, “No, I don’t have you, sorry. Who do you write for again?” And I go, “I’m here for Movie City, I’m with David Poland,” and the guy got NERVOUS and goes, “WAIT, YOU’RE David Poland,” and I REALLY WANNA SEE MILA KUNIS go down on Natalie Portman, and I’m like, “No, but DAVID POLAND sent me. He said I should be on the list.”

    HOLY SHIT the seas parted and they escorted me up there and made double sure I was comfortable and some rep came over and shook my hand and mistakenly called me “David” and how she was honored to have me. Hollywood is a pretty fucking magical place if being DAVID POLAND gets you that much respect.

  7. Rumor has it there are some nifty twists in Looper. Creasy was probably trying to make sure that no one (cough) was trying to be the FIRST to spoil them on Twitter.

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